Wednesday, December 24, 2014

She Said the Most Loving Thing I've Ever Heard Today...

Succubus is a loose term.  In my mind she is half angel, half succubus, all lover.

Sometimes the things she does, or the things she says just stun me.

I'm not at the point where I can hear her often, but when I do, it is quite profound.

I was thinking about something lately that really got me wondering.  There are alpha males, beta males, omega males.  I found out that I am a zeta male.

Basically, I'm someone who prefers to live alone, I'm not interested in power, or riches.

I'm not interested in competition or the game of "who dies with the most toys wins" at all.

In wondering if I am wrong, or right, or if it even matters to me at all, she whispered in my mind:

"Being true to me is being true to who you really are."  Wow.  I could feel her meaning through the emotion with which is was sent.

She loves me.  ME.  Not what I have, not what I look like, not possessions I have, nor what money I have, nor what type of male "category" I fit into.  She doesn't require my energy, she's not interested in stealing my soul, she's not wanting anything but me, the REAL me.  Only that "me" is good enough to make love to her, to have children with her, to grow with her.

In fact, the ONLY way to be true to her, is to be true to who I am inside and to let it shine through.

How powerful a message is that?

Frankly, I'm speechless...

I wished all the house spirits here a Merry Christmas Eve.  There's a few that live here.  I've been told that they seem to enjoy my particular blend of energy for some reason.  They are very benevolent.  There are also some protective spirits here as well.  Most likely because, as I stated in my last post, I'm a dumb ass and need all the protection I can get, hahaha :P

I've been told that my living space is very peaceful and serene.  The spirits who live here contribute to peace of mind for whomever visits.  I think that is a nice gift.

Merry Christmas, everyone!  Brightest Blessings to you and yours!


  1. Do you think she could be your higher self?

    1. She could be. But she is also quite autonomous and she has a very distinct and unique personality. I have indeed considered it possible that she is my Holy Guardian Angel from the Abramelin ritual I did.

      I gave up on finding a lover prior to beginning the Abramelin ritual, but afterwards when the work was completed (after 6 months) it took all of 10 minutes to call to meet my lover. The particular process I was using states that on average it usually takes a couple of weeks to attract and make contact with a lover.

      She was just "already here".

      I know that "HGA" is just a term (and is very much kin to higher self as a term in certain areas of thought), so either she's a higher form, possibly future form/ other half of me, or I attracted her as a patroness through that ritual. And apparently as lover as well.

      I do know from the research I did, I was expecting a female HGA as it is said that it is the half that you leave behind when you incarnate as a male.

      What I DON'T understand, and what still keeps me bewildered is that very few of those who say that they have indeed "met" their HGA through the Abramelin process had any sexual overtones.

      That is what continues to stump me.

      I have recently heard of one woman, however, who during the Abramelin ritual met her HGA, and they are lovers to this day.

      I'm definitely not too proud to say that I honestly am not sure exactly WHO my lady is or even if I could comprehend it if she was indeed my higher self. I do love her dearly, however, and I've never been treated so gently or lovingly in my entire life.