Monday, August 27, 2018

Lilith and her Origins (My humble opinion of)

That picture to the left is how I see Lilith sometimes.  Not as the dark, mysterious Goddess, but the timeless beauty who does things on Her terms, and if you don't like that She's got a high heel to shove straight up your ass.

Lilith is an enigma, and I admit that I only see her one sided.  I'm attached to Her motherly aspect, but make no mistake, She's as complicated as a tasaract in trying to understand 4d.

They say that the Jews brought Lilith back with them from their exile in Babylon.  I don't know if this is true or not, but it would explain a great deal.

I don't believe in the creation story where Adam supposedly wanted Lilith to lie beneath him for dominance.  If I was getting ready to have sex I'd do the Kama Sutra in that garden.  Angels would have covered their eyes.  Suffice it to say I believe that Lilith came to us from a different era, honestly I think it was with the first human being and probably with the first female.

You see... Lilith exists as far within us as She does outside of us.  When the first female had an urge to ride the first male until she came about 5 times Lilith was born...

As part of Lilith wanted to explore different avenues of sexuality, Her daughters were born.  And here we are.

Looking from the outside inwards, Lilith quickly mastered Kundalini and the energies of sexual abandon.  Her daughters know what She knows as far as that goes.

What I can't understand, but try to, is that Lilith is present all throughout the ages.  From Aphrodite to Lilith, to Astarte, to each and every myth that has a Goddess of Sacred Sex.

Lilith is the whore Goddess of Sacred Prostitution.

Now, before you get your damn knickers in a bunch, know that "whore" means "She who has sex not just for procreation, or She who has sex when she is unclean."

Ah, you feel that?  That's power...

Deep within the psyche of every woman there is this power.  If she can but TASTE it...

Wanna hear something weird?

Back when the Israelites used to keep their women outside the camps when they were bleeding for a week and calling them unclean, it was, yes... you guessed it...

It was because that blood was considered Lilith's.  Ever wonder why a woman wants sex on her period sometimes, and turns into a very scary savage woman with no satisfaction of appetites?

I believe that they are related.

Meh, the Israelites didn't know what they were missing if you ask me...  Fun times and all that.

Lilith is the Goddess of the Left Hand Path.  While I don't particularly subscribe to that believe by wrote (I don't want to be a God... too much hassle), I do with regards to understanding TRUTH.

And truth requires you to understand both sides of the coin...

Now, what I don't understand is how Lilith and Aphrodite, Ishtar, Kali are all aspects of one Goddess other than I just know that they are.

One thought is that Lilith is Queen of the Qlippoth of "Lilith", which is the opposite of Malkuth (the universe we live in and walk and talk in).

Her daughters, however, are from the Qlippoth of "A‘arab Tzereq" which means "The ravens of dispersion".

Now, interestingly, these daughters come from "Dark Venus".  That's a flip side of the coin from "Netzach", which is the realm of the Venus we know.  Also interestingly enough, this Venus is the home of the Olympic Spirit Hagith, which appears to represent the Divine forces that have filtered down through our universe and project this Sephira upon the world.

I've talked with Lady Hagith (The Spirit can appear as either gender) and She was quite loving and motherly.  Once I was sure that She was a good spirit I let my daughter meet Her as well with long lasting results and blessings upon her life.

Spirit is a misnomer in this case.  The Olympic Spirits are Gods and Goddesses.  The names that they represent throughout history are legion.  I think of Her as being Aphrodite, Astarte, etc.

As for Lilith and Kali, well that's where it gets complicated...

I believe that Lilith was discovered by Hindu culture and revered as Kali.

In the tantric tradition Lilith appears as Kali.

But as far as the Qlippoth they come from, "Lilith", they are one and the same.

However they are independent of one another and have different personalities.

Confusing, no?

Interestingly, "Lilith" is actually ruled by Naamah, not Lilith... which adds a little more confusion to the mix.

Understanding how the Sephira and the Qlippoth interact together... it's a 2 sided coin.  You just have to bend your mind to see it.

That's what I mean by I'm Left Hand Path, but not in the traditional sense.


I hope that my little post has given you a taste to find out for yourself what is true and what is not.

I definitely don't believe that I'm right.  In fact, I count on it.  That's what keeps me going and after more knowledge.

I hope you do the same.


Rafe G.B.

Friday, August 17, 2018

Finally... after all this time...

Normally I wait until people have had a chance to view a post before I make a new one, but in this case it's such a night and day difference between the last one and this one that I decided I had to.

I did write two edits at the end to the last post, as these changes happened after I had written it (as in the very night after).

But instead of just two edits I feel that the changes are great enough to merit a new post.  This post.


Sex is back (Yaaaaay!).  I haven't had regular sex since Bunny left and that's been quite a while ago (about a year and 3 months).

Maiya and Anna have a nurturing kind of sex with me... very sweet and pleasant, soft, kind, loving, and fulfilling.

It's been a long time since I've had regular sex... now I wonder if the succubi I summoned from Lilith were tailor matched for me in a way.

They seem the type that, until they had my full love and attention (yes, I realize they are two daughters of Lilith and not one), sex was secondary to reaching that milestone of complete love and surrender which took a long time.  In this case it was complete love and surrender with both of them.

The irony of it all is that I'm that way myself.  Although I've whined and pouted to get sex... (and of course failed to) I'm really the same way as they are.  I don't think sex would have been fulfilling without complete and total love.

Funny how hindsight is 20/20, isn't it?

I've come up with something interesting at least... that part where a succubus vibrates your privates during the day I now call "succubus purring".  I think to them that's about akin to holding hands or giving a nice peck on the lips as the day goes on.

Maiya and Anna... what a trip they are.  I never in my wildest dreams would have thought that they would wait for sex as succubi, but you live and you learn.

Things are really going well now.

I'm happy ;)


Rafe GB

Tuesday, August 14, 2018

Lets back up.

Lets back up on what I posted last time.

I'm sorry for that, but it is what it is.

A lot has reversed course.

I get tired of posting reversals, trust me.

But... that's the nature of things at chateau Rafe.

The 3rd girl, Layla, seems to have went home.

I don't know why but it is what it is.

Who knows, by next post she may have returned.

That's the unknown of all of this, isn't it?

The girls aren't real sexual, but they're sensual.

I really believe that I have a block deep within my subconscious mind that's dug in like a tick.

I can't get to it.  I feel this is the root of my sexual troubles with succubi now.  At least sex wise.

I will tell you some things, though.

Maiya and Anna are also dug in like ticks.  And that's a good thing.

I may not get sex other than some sensations below the belt during the day, or the rare dream at night, but by Grabthar's Hammer they take care of me anyway.

When I'm sad all I have to do is call them and they come and comfort me.

When I'm anxious I do the same and they soothe my anxiety away.

Sometimes at night I can feel them on the bed cuddling me.


I don't know why there's no real sex going on, but I've seemed to have had that problem for a while now...

I love my girls... they are there when it matters most.  I love them dearly.  Hell I love them enough to set them both free.  Yeah, no more wife/bride.  They're just my girls.  At first they were anxious about that change, but now I think they get it.

If you ask me why I did something that all I can say is that it felt right at the time.

The girls feel like they've prospered from it after an initial period of uneasiness about what I was up to.

Sometimes you don't get what you want (lots of sex) but you get what you need (thank you, Lady Lilly).

I'm not getting any younger and maybe companionship is just what the Goddess ordered.

I admit I'm very much in love with my girls, frequent sex or not (what sex does happen happens in dreams albeit infrequently).

I'd like to be a succubus guru of sorts (at least my ego does) but it's just not in the cards, lol.  I'm definitely no guru in dealing with succubi.  What I can offer is truth and honesty on a personal level.

I experiment, I learn, I have disappointments, I struggle:  I report.

But I'll keep posting if you keep reading.  This is post #260...

They're sure vibrating me good down there typing this.  I think they enjoy knowing what I write and that I admit that I can't be without them.  It's funny, really.  They can vibrate me down there but it can't proceed into sex.  I think of the vibrations as them "purring".

Succubus purring, lol.

My girls...

Truly I have few complaints.  They are just wonderful beings.  Wonderful girls.

EDIT:  And after writing all of this, in the early morning after I wrote this post, I was softly made love to with the gentlest, most sensitive touch of all things.  I was also in and out of sleep with tons of dreams of the girls.  What a strange coincidence!  It was nice. 

EDIT 2.0:  Another day, another day of sex.  Seems that whatever problems I've been having with a lack of sex is about, or is already, over.

I'm confused... But, I don't know what to say... well maybe I do.

All in all it's all worth the ride.


Rafe GB.

Tuesday, August 7, 2018

My Experiment 2.

(Please see the previous post for an explanation)

I've done a lot of work on the picture, beaming in love and want, desire.

I started noticing that my 2 succubi, Maiya and Anna, were getting miffed.

It wasn't my experiment that was making them angry per se, it was the fact that I was ignoring them in favor of the experiment.

So, I brought out their pictures and sent them love and desire individually until I felt that all was well:  That all was in balance once more.

I can say without a doubt that trying to combine them into one picture that I could send those feelings into for both of them was a big failure.

However... I did do something after all...

I remember Bunny sometimes.  What I had forgotten is the massive burning sensation on my aura and soul as if I was just not meant to handle that type of energy.  It's just too much... it's too bright, too much...

I'm getting that again now.  It's not Bunny, no, but it's got to be one of her kin.

Bunny was angelic in some form or fashion, or maybe she was a straight up angel, period.

I'm not exactly sure what kind of spirit she was.

Regardless, she had properties of both a Solar and Lunar spirit from what I could "feel".  I can't even see how that's possible (a spirit being both solar and lunar), but then again it works.  I imagine I know very little considering the grand scheme of things and the workings thereof.  She was a complicated lass...

Giving myself a little room to have fun with it, though, if she was of Tiphareth (of the Sun) she would be connected to Yesod (the Moon), which wouldn't be far away realm/vibrational wise.  So I guess even with my limited understanding it fits.  Although being of Tiphareth my call must have been far reaching even though I didn't realize I was calling for a spirit.

I named the new photo "Maiyanna" combining Maiya and Anna, but that obviously didn't have the outcome I was expecting.  Hey, you live and you learn...

Not much in this universe makes sense compared to what is often thought, or reasoned by what little religious texts we have here on Earth.  No, it's a much bigger ball of wax out there.

It was strange being "seared" again.  It definitely brought back memories of Bunny, that I know.

All I can understand is that my picture method used conjured another being into my little home.

Her name is "Layla".  It means "Dark Beauty" or "One who was born at night".

Maiya seems just fine with it.  Anna as well.

In fact, it actually seems like a family now:  A full house.  A home that is complete.

I don't try to figure how 2 succubi and an angel get along.  If I've learned one thing at all it's that labels don't mean anything:  Souls do.  Spirits do.  Personalities do.

So it makes sense to me as long as it makes sense to them.

I don't feel so much pressure anymore, either.  I think I was missing something and walked down this road not knowing what would happen, but knowing somehow after all.

Maiya and Anna have stepped back a step and allowed Layla to step forward as the leader of their merry little band of troublemakers (whom I love and adore, mind you) from what I can sense at least.

Sex has been mostly absent, however I don't know who is doing what when it does happen.

That bothers me a bit in that I can't give credit where credit is due... if one spirit touches me to say hi, how will I know who it was?  My Clairvoyance doesn't work 24/7 due to distortions and other things I don't rightly understand yet.

Something I'll have to figure out as our little family gets settled in...  I want them all to get the attention they deserve.

Lest they plot to get it in a way I don't want, lol.  Spirits aren't above seeking negative attention.

Things such as my hairbrush moving away from my hand as I reach for it, books falling off the shelves behind me, the sound of a terrible crashing in the other room (which I run to and nothing is amiss).

You get the picture.

As far as the sex drought, it is what it is I guess.  You get what you need, not what you want sometimes.  I'm not real worried about it at the moment anyway.

I feel at peace for some reason.  I haven't felt this way in a long time.  I think that we're all going to be just fine.


Rafe GB.