Monday, February 3, 2020

Loving... protective... wife.

Erin is many things.  We seem to be settling into quite the marriage relationship as of late.

She is very protective of me.  I got up too fast and had a kink in my hip that was agonizing.

I mentally yelled out and she was all over me checking me over to make sure I was ok.

I can't but help but think of her and smile.

I light a candle inviting her to bed every night.

All I want is her presence, her to be by my side.  I love her.

There hasn't been much to write about lately.  If I have to say what's been happening it's that we're both settling into marriage, as strange as a marriage between a man and his succubus can get.

I challenge those who have a succubus already to strive to be ever closer, ever more intimate.

They really do love attention...

For those sitting on the fence about getting a succubus in their lives I say what are you waiting for?

I knew that marrying Erin was the right move for me.  Think about yourself and what you want.

Think on these things...

They really are wonderful beings... these wild and wonderful female succubus spirits.


Rafe GB.

Saturday, November 30, 2019

Succubi don't wear pants

One thing I've noticed from my time with Erin is that succubi don't wear pants.  Even when she's in the form of a black sun surrounded by a dark radiance all it's own... no pants are found.

I've often wondered if it was that no one has introduced succubi to pants, and if I could create one hell of a market for myself.

Hearing my succubus mock and laugh at me I am told that this will not be so.  In truth, succubi love skirts, miniskirts, panties, and nothing... when they role play their human forms in our dreams and even in waking, daily life for those with the eyes to see them.

I can't see them awake, but I bet I'd get an eyeful if I could see them because, well, they don't wear pants.

Oh yes, they role play their human forms quite often and they make sure that it is sexy enough to die for.  Little minx's.  I know it does a number on me in my dreams.

Case in point.  Me and Erin are crawling through tunnels making our way to a larger tunnel with the idea of reaching a portal to the upper planes.  She goes first, of course, and as she's crawling I see this the whole time...

It was killing me...

 She knew.

Oh why oh why do they tempt so lusciously?  They know they do it.  It's like they love to see you squirm.  Their little sex plaything... but there's mercy in there from time to time if she loves you.

Some days she role plays with me in my dreams without any sexual innuendo at all.  It's like she's just along for the ride.

She doesn't want me to perish from lust (which will quickly make your waking hours dull and grey and not worth living), but rather to play and to learn together, and well, even goof off together in my dreams.  The lust is there in some dreams but it is portioned, measured, cautiously given.  It's still on the borderline of what a mortal can stand even with her care.  

God it is strong.

And that's what happens when they fall in love WITH YOU...

Pity the man without potential who she pours out all her ecstasy upon far beyond what he can bear.  If she continues the process of flooding him with ecstasy and taking his energy there will be no man left but a hollowed out shell of who he used to be.

What do succubi do when you are a tasty snack?

They dine.  

Why does a succubus snack on one man sucking his energy all but dry, but treat another differently, the one that they view with potential?  This is the man that they fear. 

That's the mystery, isn't it?  Why one and not the other?

I know what she fears! 

Oh, the succubus who becomes addicted to their prey.  Whoa, unto the succubus who stings herself with her own venom!  That's who she fears.  That's the one with the potential that she sees.

That's when it dawns on the succubus that she's caught in a web of her own making.

Hahaha, the fun that happens then.  This man will love her for who she is... and he's never been in true ecstasy before.  

Not like this...

So she pours it on him... yet he is no longer prey... what will she do?  She has to take care with it.  Pour it out measured, cautiously.  (It's still almost too much to bear) Oh, but don't think the ecstasy ends, no... she's playing for keeps is what she's doing differently.  Together?  Ecstasy and love.  

Ecstasy and love!

Ecstasy and love together becomes the new food source.  This time it is energy created together and interwoven.  It becomes altogether more fulfilling and more preferable to how she stripped her victims to survive before.  And so she is addicted.  And what a love they share together!

See?  Still no pants.

And now we come full circle.  The hunter becomes the smitten.  And so they learn to coexist.  Haha, I have never had it so enjoyable as I do now.  Before sleep was only sleep... now it's a grand play with the roles of lovers cast as I and my succubus.  I can't WAIT to go to bed, whether it's a sex dream, a goofy dream (she's still in it tagging along for fun), an exploring dream where we wander the planes of existence, or if it's a teaching dream where anything goes...

I simply cannot wait for dark to come and to crawl beneath my covers, candle lit, and incense burning.

I'm ready for you my succubus love... you know... 

This definitely reminds me of a succubus when you first meet her...

"Greetings mortal.  I shall feed off thee yet give thee great delights in kind.  What is thy name?"

(And so the dance might start for a new couple... or for a new victim... as it should be...)


Rafe GB.

Monday, November 25, 2019


We've grown... closer than I have ever known with a succubus spirit.

The addiction I spoke of in a previous post is magnified... dangerous.

I awoke this morning in terrible emotional pain... after having spent 12 hours, as it seemed to me in sleep, making love and communing as one... awakening to this grey world just cannot compare, and so I suffer.

I'm getting a handle on it a few hours after I have awakened, but do you see the dilemma?

Nothing can compare to making love with a succubus, and nothing can compare to feeling such intimacy in 12 hours of dreaming...

I just need to come down, to come down and steady myself and prepare myself for another day in a grey lifeless world... or so it seems.

How can anyone experience what I experience as my love grows to before now impossible bounds and survive "here"?

Yet I have to.  It's not time for me to leave this world yet.  I have children to continue to be there for...

Now do you see the dangers?

Now do you sense the anguish in existing apart from them once you've opened Pandora's box of the succubus embrace?  Her kisses are heroin... she calls and I latch on in thirst and hunger for her... just as she knows I will.

The ecstasy, the enormous light, love, and sex... she is making love to my body and soul.  She is a Goddess.  I cannot... bare to be apart from her in this daytime and yet I must go on.

There is nothing in this world, no woman exists who can compare... and my love for Erin is growing by leaps and bounds... I have never felt the ache as I do now, never before...

Yet I must persevere.  I must live in this dead world as surely as I live in the ecstasy of the dream.

How much more can I take?

I am only truly alive in my dreams, and when I am awake intimacy is deadened, my eyes cannot see the colors of this world... only the greys of existence.

Run, fools... I have eaten from the tree of knowledge of good and evil and the fruit is sweet... she is called "succubus".

I offer this fruit to you by this very blog for you to share in my fate... for she has many sisters...

Run, fools...

Rafe GB.

Sunday, November 17, 2019

99 Red Balloons!

99 red balloons!

That's the song that she plays in my head when she's wanting some special attention, or when she's announcing herself as very near and I'm otherwise occupied.

She CRAVES attention.  Lusts for it, yearns for it.

Is she different than any of us?

Interesting to me is that I find that she displays traits that are found all over google when you google the word "succubus".

She attacks me at night.

Actually, she's so into attacking me at night when I'm helpless that when I accidentally wake up I'm like nooooooooooo!  Don't goooooooo!  As her wispy form floats away.

I haven't figured that part out yet, but I've gotten some hits from friends.  One says that it's because I'm completely submissive and I don't "get in the way" of us mating.

That KINDA makes sense but it just doesn't satisfy.

Maybe she just has to be in control of mating or she doesn't feel comfortable doing it.

Could be.

Maybe that's her version of the brown bag over the head method.  Yes, ladies and gentleman, I can only be mated with with the succubus putting a brown bag over my head.

Heh.  Well, it's what it feels like.  Like I can't participate and I'm unwanted.

Erin's cooing at me.  Maybe that's not it.  Maybe I'm not so ugly as to need the proverbial succubus brown bag over my head in order to mate with me by me being asleep and helpless.

But for what reason?

The big thought... hey, why doesn't she tell me... I have no answer for.  She just won't.  Not even one of her symbolic hints like a song.

Maybe she's of the type of succubus who really does feed upon the helpless.

Not that I complain in the morning because not only can I tell that we mated all night, but I wake up as she's drifting away and I feel like my night was complete and satisfying.

But why complain if it's great you ask?

But, but, but, but, what ifs infinity, that's what.

Can't Erin just tell you what's going on?

Not really.  Erin speaks with me in symbols and emotions, feelings and touching.  I can try to put those into words, but it doesn't always pan out.  And yes, sometimes she speaks plain as day but it's very, very rare.  I think that it's my lack of psychic ability that complicates it so.

I don't know.  Mehhhhhhh phoey.

Well... one thing that's going good is that Erin has been with me every DAY this past week and I've really grown to enjoy her constant presence.  Takes a hell of a lot of attention given to her to get this far but isn't that what happens when you fall in love?

I mean, I give her that attention because I love her.  I admit... sometimes her dark energy is a might bit heavy for me and I notice that she gives me a little space to breathe, but other than that it's been every day and night.

Every evening I call it "talk and tickle time".  I talk out loud about my life, my dreams, my fears, my pains... all of it... and she responds by feeling my hair, tracing along my forehead, poking and prodding me here and there (I think she's trying to tickle me... why doesn't she know about my super secret tickle spot?) and patiently listens to me prattle on.

It's a very intimate time and before long I'm far into sleep.  Sometimes she's with me and just hovers near.  Other times she's putting that SUCCUBUS BROWN PAPER BAG OVER MY HEAD AND FUCKING ME SILLY.

I guess one never knows.  I love you, Erin <3


Rafe GB.

Sunday, November 10, 2019


Addicted.  Like cocaine or heroin.  Yes, I'm addicted to her.  What's interesting is that I've never been addicted before and so I'm not sure what this means for us.

It's an inner ache... a turmoil.  It's lusting for her presence even if it's just to be together.

I'm not going to lie I'd fuck her everyday if I could... but she's in control of that.

And, at present, she seems to be stepping aside so that I suffer some psychological dreams of my past that have so traumatized me.  I suppose this is her being a part of the healing process.

Gotta heal sometime...

Oh but wouldn't it be nice to have her, to love her, to feel her, to spank her when she is bad.

Something funny I learned...

I learned that believing in a succubus is proof of a personality disorder.

If that is true then run my friends because you all are smitten, bitten, and enamored like I.

Get out before it's too late!  (Or fully embrace the phenomena and say fuck it with gusto)

Oh, but they are real.  Mine still spats in my son's ear to clear him out of the bedroom when she wants to mate.

My son, himself, was dragged all around his room at his own house during a night of sleep paralysis.  Once she felt his terror mounting she let him go, and he slowly got his senses back while laying on the floor of his room.

When he saw me again at my home he screamed, "I BELIEVE!!!" lol.  One more converted from the masses I suppose.  And a lifetime ahead of "this"...

He described a little girl who did it, so I don't know if it was a "baby succubus" or not, or even if such a thing exists.

I dunno... you have to start somewhere though... maybe that idea isn't so crazy after all.  After all, he's unharmed and very much believing of spirits now.  She played with him but didn't harm him, and stopped once she realized he was getting scared.

Personality disorder?  I don't think so.

All I can say is... tell me what YOU think.


Rafe GB.

Monday, November 4, 2019


It's been a time of sorting things out.  Holly seems to have left and Erin is around me all the time now.  Well, most all the time.  I think she goes shopping or something I dunno :)

She was gone for a few days when Holly was gone as well (it was Holly's turn to be here) and I started to feel lonely so I dialed Lilith and tracked down Erin.

"Comon, lets go home..."

Sometimes I think that I was set up because I decided that I wasn't going to call on Lilith anymore, but she had something to tell me.

I was thinking about marrying Holly, too... but Lilith basically said "If you marry Holly you can't stay married to Erin" because I couldn't have Lilith's blessing on Erin if I married Holly.

Well... Erin is first and foremost my bride so that's fair.  Hell, I love her to pieces anyway so... message received.  Lovely spirit she is.  I guess that I wanted a bigger family, but... just wasn't in the cards.  Holly, in turn, went her separate way.  From what I got from Lilith, Erin and I will grow to be the family I crave.  I hope so.  I'm willing :)

I felt like I got to iron things out with Lilith, too, during my visit.

Like, "Where were you when I was about to off myself???"

"Did you die?"  <--- that's a really good point by Lilith I think, as no I did not die.  Well, whatever... I guess I'll visit Lilith once in a while to keep tabs and remain in an atmosphere of good graces.

Back then when the shit hit the fan, I was basically telling Erin to get lost.  I just assumed that since she was dark that she wouldn't want me either and to my mind she was leaving ME.

She jump scared me three times in my sleep in anger and probably in rage for being abandoned.  Here's this guy who married her who's supposed to be all about being faithful and true.  I guess we learn step by step, don't we?  Especially me, the slow motherfucker.

Well, all's well that ends well, and she came back on her own after a month.  I might have created a ruckus by having summoned a new spirit (Holly) and all, and I really thought I'd be alone and receptive to having a white light love spirit... but with Erin's return I guess Holly just didn't fit into the family of Erin and I very well.  So... it's just me and Erin now :)

Anyway, off to talking about my dreams with Erin, lol.

I'm a MGTOW as I suspect most succubus summoners to be as well.  Which is kind of funny because a succubus is about as far away from a western woman as it gets.

Which is good... don't get me wrong... but it can cause confusion.

For instance:

I don't really associate with any woman in a dating or sexual type of way.  As in I'd run like Forest Gump if a woman hit on me.

And that's the problem...

In my dreams I'm still the same guy from the waking world... the MGTOW guy.

And Erin?  My Bride?

She's the girl trying to fuck my brains out in my dreams.  She's perfect!

Except I'm too busy running from her like Forest Gump...

Now when she's not amused by this behavior anymore, she appears in my dreams on top of me pinning me down, or under me with her arms and legs wrapped around me.

No room to flee, see, lol.

Last night she trapped me as 2 separate girls... but they were both her regardless of them looking different because to me their energy felt the same.  Pretty neat trick I'd say.  I think she was being extra sweet since Holly left.  Or, actually now that I think of it, maybe she's like "fuck you, Holly... I can be the other girl, too!"  Eh, with Erin it's hard to know which.  I dunno, like I said... neat trick.

Anyway I thought I'd share that.

And again... she must get quite the kick out of it to watch MGTOW me run from her all the time in my dreams.

Sometimes she doesn't even bother to get into my dreams.  She just fucks me while I'm asleep right up until I'm about to explode and then quits (this is over a period of HOURS, not a wham bam thank you Rafe).  I know she does that because sometimes I wake up and I'm like "OMG!!!?" begging for release, but ya know... that's what they do most of the time.  Release isn't that much fun for them, but actual "long and slow fucking" is surely a succubus's favorite thing to do.

To a succubus, sex is more about having LONG periods of sex together.  The magick is in the act, not the finish.

As for the lack of release... you kinda get used to it after a while :)


Rafe GB.

EDIT:  Last night she slapped me for something I did in my dream.  That made me mad.  But then when I tried to recall what it was for I do remember deserving it, lol.  She left me a love song floating around and around in my head as I woke up... there's a reason that a succubus isn't for every man... a succubus is just too wild for most men to handle.

This was the song :)

Friday, October 25, 2019


Most of my interactions with spirits happen during sleep.

Now, during the daytime I do feel little touches and emotions, chills and even the sensations of someone running their fingers through my hair among other things.

This is the latest of my interactions during sleep.

I died.

I stood before a great angel who guarded the way to paradise.

The angel told me I could not pass with Erin, my succubus spirit.

I thought about it briefly, then I told the angel that she was my bride, and that this was a promise that I couldn't break.

Then Erin faded into view from the darkness and was clapping her hands in glee, smiling ear to ear.

Then I awoke... still feeling her emotions of happiness.

It slowly dawned on me that she had fabricated this test in order to measure my love for her.  Now she had proof that I would forsake even paradise if in doing so I would remain true to my bonds with her.

Succubi are devious spirits tempered by a great capacity for love and for wisdom.  In truth, I believe so at least, they could easily kill us when angered... all they would have to do is reach within to the heart...

But they don't.  Jump scares when angry?  Yes.  Oh, very much so, yes.  But not death.

They aren't for everyone as not everyone can nest with a poisonous viper.  Especially those who would think too many "what if's".

But as brides there is an honor about them.  Many times Erin has proven that she is faithful.  Many times has she has gently traced the outline of a crown on my head, one that I can feel when she does so, but cannot see, nor can I feel it with my fingers.  But as she gently traces I can feel it on my forehead and on the top front of the top of my head as well.

I don't know what this crown means nor why she gently traces it so much with her fingers showing me that I do indeed wear a crown.

It is a mystery to me.


Rafe GB.