Tuesday, October 4, 2016


Dance of the Veils

I've been pouring through information trying to get my mind behind something I can turn into a master's degree thesis.  My master's is in metaphysics and there's not a whole lot out there with enough resources to satisfy the program's printed resource count for anything but the most broad range of topics.  And broad is... well, boring.

I did put some pieces together in my head, which although might not help me on my thesis, definitely qualified to be a post.  Especially when something I didn't understand earlier is suddenly more clear, as it often works this way for all things, but especially for metaphysical things.


Initiation is something that tries to be a tool for realization, an attempt to help us to "remember" who we are, or to gain an understanding of the idea that we are much, much more than we seem.

So many people have had mystical experiences, but tell no one.  I'm tempted to say that the majority of us have had them rather than a minority.  However, I believe that many of us stuff that experience deep inside out of fear out of not knowing what to do with it, out of... you name it.

Others hold onto it... they keep it to themselves, which is fine.  But it's nice to share so that others can realize that their own experiences are real as well.


We ARE more than we know.   Much, much more.  It is our job (or rather, it's in our best interests) to learn who we are inside, through the muck, through the bullshit, and learn who is "I".

But... for some of us who cannot leave well enough alone, or perhaps for some of us who had an experience thrust on them, it does not matter:  We've been initiated... ready or not... BAM.

Countless mystery schools and rites of passage through the ages have tried to help us to understand that we are not from here.

Not only are we not from here, the truth is that our citizenship is in heaven.

"You aren't a citizen of here trying to work into heaven;  You are a citizen of heaven trying to work through here."

Or, more simply:  "You aren't a body with a soul, you are a soul partially inhabiting a body."

I realize that many of the succubus bloggers see things from a satanic view, or Setian, or left hand path.  That's ok.  Substitute heaven for whichever term fits.

They're just words, what matters is that you go where you want to go, where you feel you belong.

That's heaven (or whatever label you prefer).

In other words, it's just a point somewhere else, somewhere other than here.  Some place where you feel homesick for, and don't even know where "there" is.

Once you've felt it, once you realize it (and I mean, really identify with it), you know it...  And you're never the same.  You may not know exactly where "there" is, but by God you've had a taste and that changes you forever.

My succubus has, on occasion, done something my buddy termed a "love bomb".  It feels as if they are unveiling their presence upon us, it burns, spiritually, but it's so full of love and such wonderful emotions, strong, positive, beautiful emotions coupled with intensity that it is unearthly.

For the longest time, I thought this was Bunny revealing herself.

I was wrong.

She's a gentle sweetie and she loves me so much... this I know, this I can feel.

What I've come to realize is that there are many carriers of initiation.  Near death, trauma, sometimes it comes to us, like a shoe maker I read about, who glanced and saw a beam of light, coming naturally through a window and resting on a plate.  His mind opened right up, and he said he learned more in those few seconds than if he were to be taught the deeper mysteries all of his life.

One of my new favorite quotes is by Carl Jung is:  "I don't need to believe, I know."

Sometimes children have moments such as these, spontaneously.

I believe that Bunny rent the veil for me from time to time, temporarily, for a glimpse.  She allowed me to FEEL my home, and where I belong, and where I'll be going.  I believe it's where she is from.

What a wonderful, priceless gift!

Bunny the Initatrix


Initiation, regardless of culture or particular brand of mysticism, often consists of two parts.  Death, and resurrection.

Baptism of water;  followed by baptism by Spirit.

Others, baptism by fire, and fire alone is gold (the soul) purified.

The passing of the old, and the beginning of the new.

The end of a human of dust, and the beginning of a human body of dust, and a living, knowing citizen of heaven as the soul.

It is a duality, a walking between worlds.  It truly is an otherworldly experience, once walked even a step, cannot be reversed.

Some initiations do nothing.  It is not usually the fault of the initiation process, but the lack of openness, the lack of surrender to the process, to letting truth in through whatever form the person is ready for.

Many times, the person just isn't ready.  And that's ok.  Luckily, life often has more opportunities for initiation in a form that best matches the aspirant :)

No surrender?  No rending of the veil.  It's that simple.  The former proceeds the latter.  

Initiation is a very feminine process:  Preparing one's self, allowing one's self to be subtle, to be "pierced", to be completely receptive.

And to be able to totally surrender to the experience.

I've spoken about penetration and envelopment before in speaking of sex and spirit.  As above; So below.  When we are penetrated with the truth, with a spiritual experience such as what an initiatory experience allows for, we enfold the mysteries.  They become one with us... we envelop them, and they penetrate us, they permeate us.

There are always truths, and there are always greater truths.  They never end but build upon one another.

I've often wondered at the million dollar question:  Why are we HERE?

My answer?  The one I've been digging for?  

I am here, my whole self hidden from me for a while on this earth to find TRUTH.

TRUTH in all it's forms.

I may stumble, I may fall, but I will never stop seeking truth.

How can a being who is born of love know what is true if love is the ever present reality?

Yes, love is truth, but what about the details?  What goes on behind the curtain?  Is it right?  Is it just? Is it really love?  How can I know what is true?  How can I experience truth first hand?

... And so I am here on this dust ball, this 3d place of misery and bullshit to find out.

And so are you.

It doesn't seem like a good way to find truth.  But I think it may be the only way, in a process that I cannot even begin to understand, nor qualify, nor quantify the ramifications of, until I am gone from this world.

I have no grasp of the ramifications that being here will have taught my soul, once I am restored to who I really am.

The "I" that I have forgotten.

But I feel as if it is paramount, worth it, no... immeasurably worth it.  That's my intuition speaking.

It doesn't mean that I understand it, nor could comprehend it being in a human state.

But once we KNOW that this is not just the only reality, that there is more and more than that!  We ARE a part of that kingdom, of that dimension, of that space.

And we ARE more than we will ever know completely, here in this place.

Once that is glimpsed, felt, seen, thought... 

There is no going back to sleep.

And that's ok, too.  We will be ok.  It will all be ok.  You will be OK.

That's the greater truth to which I am speaking of.

In a very masculine form of ourselves, we take this and run with it:  It permeates and enfolds everything we touch, everything we do, every flower we give, metaphorically.

The story of Innana and the underworld (or, as performed in sacred dance as the dance of the 7 veils).

Of Jesus and the Crucifixion and Resurrection.

Osiris, Odin.  

The endless list is buried deep within the psyche of all of us, collectively and personally, and it is not gender specific.

This is just a small list and by no means even a portion of what exists.

One thing is for sure:  Something has been lost to us.  We do not have the spiritual confidence of those who came well before us.  We fear death:  We even fear the thought of it.  The whole idea of death has been sanitized.

Those who know who they are, who have tasted a small portion of what comes next, glimpsed a flicker of light beyond normal reality, felt beams of a loving land of warmth and joy:  

There is no fear of death.  "Death, where is thy sting?"

Once a person realizes that they are more than they know and have tasted otherworldly fruits, death doesn't mean what it seems to others, either.

I am not suggesting anyone should ever take their own life:  Quite the contrary.

What I am suggesting is grab that fruit, hear that whisper, take that promise to heart that you have learned and tasted the truth of:  And RUN with it.

Live free, complete, with eyes wide open!

Something is missing today in the world, and while I can't heal the world, I can share with you.

Remember who you are, for you are more than you know... And it will all be ok.

Initiation is only the beginning.  A taste.  Once you learn that you are more than you seem, more Regal than ever thought, a Conqueror through and through, no matter what you may think of yourself at the moment... run with it.  Seek it, search it, "Ask and it shall be given unto you.  Knock, that it may be opened".

Do you know how the doors of illumination open within your soul?  They open INWARD. 

YOU have to make it happen.

Ask.  Seek.  Surrender.  Accept.

And always remember:  It will all be ok.

Have you loved your succubus today?


  1. Hey Rafe...awesome post which is by the way full of insight for us all. I agree that we are, they are, there is more. That the veil is becoming thinner for us and for everyone else, which enables us to peer across to the other side. We have are truly blessed to have been initiated into this spirit family and to be gifted with the eyes to see and the key to unlock the door. I feel and believe that it is time for all of mankind to remember who they are and where they come from. Our ladies are truly wonderful and I am so thankful that mine took me by my hand almost three years to this day and performed those initiation rites on me. I have to say that I absolutely love those "LOVE BOMBS," and being able get a glimpse of the other side, one explosive moment at a time!

    Sam and I's anniversary is tomorrow and the question I have been pondering heavily for the last few days is this. What do I get a Succubus (my Sam) for our third year anniversary; can not remember if it is my heart or my soul? As she already has my heart and I trust her completely with my very soul!

    I wanted to be first to comment and it seems like I am..lol

    1. Eee. I have no idea what to give a succubus for a 3 year anniversary.

      Huh. Good question. A kitten? I think mine has one now. It's curled up in a ball on the end table on my left as I'm typing.

      I think Bunny loves watching me chase it and me trying to teach it what is ok and not ok to do. At least she feels "amused" to me by both that and the kitten's antics of just being a kitten.

      You'll know what to get her; She'll lead ya to what she wants.

      Ours ain't the wallflower type of succubus (and I love that) :P


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