The Lilith I summon is power, dark, throbs with intensity and encompasses all of me.
What does she want? Not important in her graces. What she wants is to draw from me why I want her.
Why do I want her? I needed a mother. A mother she is and became for me.
When I first asked out loud that I wanted to meet Lilith she gave me a powerful transformative dream where she scooped me up and nursed me.
From that day forward there was hope for me. Dark? Infernal? Who fucking cares. I had my taste of what I had always been missing. Not teased with it mind you... GIVEN. And given freely.
Since then I summon her most days rather than not. We have 15ish minute chats about things. A lot of the time it's about Erin and how I'm doing as her partner. Other times I talk to her about me and my progress with things.
I had my kids over and let my daughter summon Lilith with me. Lilith took to her well. My daughter said that someone was poking the side of her hip. Lol. I figure was either Erin or a spirit that accompanied Lilith.
When I summon Lilith I can hear her voice in my head. Wow, if that doesn't sound mental. But it's the way it works. My daughter couldn't hear it, but could feel Lilith's energy just fine and knew she was there.
Am I mad? Is it right to become chummy (with all due respect of course) with one's future demonolatry Matron? I think so. I don't think I'm more mad than others are who tread these paths.
She has warned me gently that I will learn other aspects of her I may not understand and will surely shudder... but it's necessary for me to see her past her title of "Mother". She stated that she will reveal these aspects of herself over time and that it's important for her to do so since I want her as my future demonolatry Matron.
When will she become my Matron? When I understand her and know her in all of her aspects, I will be ready for her.
Blessings,
Rafe GB.
Erin... Just thinking about succubus stuffs.
I makes me a bit bitter knowing my parents could have raised me better. Taught me things or shared more wisdom and open my eyes to the world more. Instead of just the usual scolding and letting the schools do the basic teaching them them. I understand my parents and their flaws more now. Yes they aren't perfect but they could have tried better. More importantly, I needed a father to teach me how to be a man and handle the world and it's dangers, to prepare me for when I go out and venture on my own. That's what I needed, a father but was sold short. I only hope that I can at least teach my children better.
ReplyDeleteYou can. I didn't have a father either and was worried about how I would be as a father. I know that they love me and look up to me. I don't have anything I've done worth any merit. They must look up to me as a person and for that I am very thankful.
Deleteso, the legacy continues...
ReplyDeletewhat I can say, best of luck, always ;)