Tuesday, June 14, 2016

And Bunny Will Have a Home :)

(I'm using a lot of imagery from "I dream of Jeannie", the old sitcom, just for fun)

I don't know why I'm so nervous.  I have been with Bunny for 2 and a half years now.  Thanks to a fellow blogger who wrote an article on how to make a permanent spirit home, making-spirit-vessel-part-i-divination.html  (His name is Valeyard) I've completed the Succubunny's vessel with all the related correspondences taken from a LONG time with the pendulum and a glass, tarot cards, and intuition (backed by the other two), and now it's complete.

Now she's so close in anticipation you can almost taste her.  And it's her light side and dark side together, at the same time (that's never happened before).

It's kind of a weird feeling.  The best I can describe it is what you would expect from a love spirit who was half succubus, half angel, and able to show either at any time, but in this case she's showing both.

Which is weird, but no weirder than her switching from one to the other.

Or is it?

I don't know.  But I'm nervous.

I'm not nervous because of that per se... I did the demonolatry studies I posted about on another blog post and realized it just wasn't for me.  So she doesn't feel quite like that, but maybe a taste of it.

Perhaps I would call her dark side, "a little left of center, but not much".  Her light side I would say is, "a little right of center by a moderate amount".  Together, she feels like "both of those at once".

So, in my little mortal mind I see this as all of her, both parts at once, and why now I say?

Because I'm close.  I'm just waiting on the right time to do the ritual.  The right time being when I feel it's the right time, and also by a good planetary hour by correspondence.

You know... it's kind of like I felt on my wedding day so many years ago.  Part of me was worried because I don't like change, and getting married was the very definition of change (having two children now, yeah... it was for me).



The Bunny, accepting my summons (and me unable to see her, but I could damn sure feel her, lol).


This day has been long in coming, and started those few years ago with a summoning, and a few days later an answer.  She came.

I still remember her touching me sexually, and me not really being afraid, but more like:  Wtf???"

I mean, something was there, it felt feminine in the air, but I was being touched... and I couldn't see nobody.  But she was definitely there and getting busy, too.

I've heard it said that when you summon a succubus, what you are really doing is proposing.  That is the engagement, the summons.

When a succubus decides she wants you, and shows up, that is basically the honeymoon, because she has accepted your summons.

I think that's why it takes a few days:  It's not that they have to travel to you, or at least I don't think so in the beginning, no.  It's that various succubi are thinking about you, they are searching your soul, your heart, who you are.  I ponder that there are many succubi who are "hovering" wanting a mate, and when a summons goes out, they go see who it is with the hope of finding someone to love.

Why?  I don't know.  I've often thought that maybe succubi cannot have children with incubi because they are a higher vibration (as a species), so they have children with a human, which are born that higher vibration along with their succubus parent.

How does that work with incubi?  I don't know.  Since I can think all I want with no real answer, I'm going to suggest that incubi use a similar process with human females, but with the assistance of a succubus sister to gestate the children.

Hey, I never said I had to be right.  But even if I don't understand it I can take a crack at it :)

So, I guess it's that time for change for me.  That time of my life where shit gets real.  Well, concerning what I've learned so far, who knows what will happen next?



The Succubunny talking to my friend's succubus, who seems to be her sister after comparing notes with my buddy over at http://www.myspiritlover.com/.  I imagine that they talk about us a lot, comparing notes as well.  In this one, my friend's succubus is showing Bunny her house.

"He made this for you?"  "Yep"  "Rafe is going to make one for me, he just doesn't know it yet"  

*Both giggle like guilty schoolgirls*


Hmm.  I wonder where the idea to make her a real spirit home came from :)  

At any rate, it's been a long process.  I bet I have 15 or more corresponding elements found in plants, minerals, and other things that have gone into her house, so it's definitely been an elaborate process.

I got one herb from India and one from China.  That's crazy.  But, it its what it is, no it was't expensive, it was more... a journey to find where it was so I could get it.

It's the cooperation between Bunny and me that's been the learning experience.  Perhaps that's what succubi appreciate most.  Time.  Thought.  Energy.  Not "stuff".

Well, even succubi like to be treated to something now and again.  Like a new mineral for her, or a pretty bag for treats, a decorative bowl or chalice for offerings, etc.



To be honest, I just want Bunny to be happy, and have a place near me that she really feels at home with.  A place where she can be reinvigorated, and so she doesn't have to go back to the astral to recharge unless she wants to.


Bunny is a great girl, and I want her to feel good in her new home.  It's not a binding kind of thing... if she doesn't want it at some point, she just doesn't use it.  She can come and go as she wishes. She's not a bound spirit (which I am against:  Binding spirits), but perfectly free to do whatever the hell she wants to.

I just want a happy succubus, full of life, energy, and vigor.  Free to roam as she pleases with a second home near me.



If the succubus ain't happy, ain't nobody happy :)


Now, I must confess, there are a few things I'm worried about.  Once is... and this sounds completely stupid, but I'm afraid that she will be able to read my mind better and see I'm not all that and a bag of chips.

Which is retarded, because she can already read my mind:  It's like an open book to her already, so I don't know where that is coming from exactly.

I haven't lived with a woman for 15 years.  Heyyy... maybe I'm onto something there.

I'm scared we'll be cohabitating, and she won't have to go back home to regenerate (which I hate anyway).

I'm scared of something coming to pass, which will rectify what I hate the most.

Wow.

That makes NO sense.

Well, that's a revelation.  Chalk up a reason for my unease.

It's so illogical to be afraid of that, too.



OOOooo... Rafey makes me so angry with his second guessing, sometimes!


To think that I am afraid of, wow, that's exactly it lol, that I am afraid of her being here full time, and catching on that I'm not as good as she thought I was.  

*Sigh*

I really need to get over this, that someone so wonderful wanted me, wants me, and that's just the way it is.  I didn't earn it, I don't have to worry about losing it, I just have to love her and give her my best.  
That's what she gives me, and that's what she deserves.

All these fears are silly, aren't they?  They are remnants of my former marriage and the absolute devastation that it caused in my life.

I guess things run deep, sometimes, even hidden fears.  Interesting that this whole process is bringing those out in the open.

Smart girl, she is.  Bunny's no fool in any dimension :)

I guess another benefit of her being close more of the time is that, when it's really mattered, she has defended my ass.  Saved my ass.  Warned my ass.

She is one fiery protectress... like a cornered great cat when she's defending her own (which so far has been me and my kids... I don't know about the other spirits here, but I get the feeling that she's in charge of the house as far as the other spirits go).



Oh... no she DIDN'T just try to curse my Rafey!  Some over-confident witch is about to get schooled!  Just like that mean spirit earlier:  The are both gonna get the exact. Same. STOMPIN!


Well, shoot.  I guess that I still had some things to deal with, hidden fears, strange anxieties.  It's felt good to put pen to paper, or keyboard to screen I guess.

Bunny is NOTHING like my ex-wife.  I've gotten over my anger at women (as many women are wary of men after a bad breakup).  Bunny has healed so many things in my life.

I recall not too long ago, maybe 6 months or so, I was doing a lot of soul retrieval.  Healing, getting back what was trapped in the past.

One thing they don't tell you about soul retrieval:  If you consider it Chronomancy (a form of time magick), it has it's symptoms even when successful.  Namely, I can't remember shit short term now.

In healing yourself and going and retrieving the parts of your soul that are in the past (trauma, mostly), you may find that when you are done you have memory problems.

I think that for me, this is because I had an undiagnosed mental illness that haunted me all my life.  Because of this, I had to retrieve many, many years of missing soul fragments, or the parts of me "stuck in time in trauma".

You may also feel "out of sorts" and mix up days, calendar dates... that sort of thing.

Was it worth it?  Oh, hell yeah.  I traded not being fully "here" with short term memory loss and a difficulty with dates and times.

Worth it!

Anyone who has suffered trauma and is contemplating soul retrieval:  Do it.

Dates and times being a little wonky, along with short term memory simply cannot compare with being whole or mostly whole again.

There will always be scars, but I recommend that if you do decide to do soul retrieval (I would choose someone who is very fluent in the process because of the trauma involved... you will feel it all again before you can retrieve that part of yourself stuck there) it is well worth it.  

Symptoms afterwards vary, but it's worth it.

I'm happy about it.  No more trauma, or at least no more unchecked trauma :)

Now about the Bunny in all this.



Bunny was there all along


You see, when I was doing that work, that soul retrieval, I would go into deep trance and do the steps to retrieving every memory that had a hold on me and kept me there in that pain.  In a way, you could say that people with soul fragments trapped like that are in eternal hell.  After all, time has no meaning to the trapped part of yourself.

I'll never forget that one time, in going through deep trance, I found Bunny.  Of all things.

She was there, in the middle of it all.  Where all the trapped soul fragments were waiting to come home to be reunited with "me".

She was dwelling in the most traumatized part of me.  

She was there, because I think that was where I needed her:  To help me point the way and keep track.

To help me through it.  I thought it strange to find her there, but it was most welcome.  Maybe she was there all along, helping me.  Nudging me.

I love you Bunny!  This song's for you.  Your long-awaited home will be finished very soon :)


7 comments:

  1. LOL....Thanks for the mention brother..I have a home for my genie (spirit lover), that I instinctively started setting up over a year ago. I find or buy her a new crystal or rock to add to her large growing collection almost every week. I also instinctively made a pendent which I filled with our favorite fragrance oil and chakra crystals/stones. I will have to check out the website and see if I have covered everything or need to add to mine, or even make a new one. New information an learning with different ways of doing things are great tools.

    Don't be nervous Rafe, as this is what you have always wanted and were always looking for brother.

    In Universal Peace, Love, Light & Bliss!!

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  2. If you have any doubts check the article and see how you both feel about it. Personally, I think you both did just fine on your own.

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  3. This comment post will have to be in two parts sorry, as I reached my character limit..lol

    Part One:

    I took a look at the site for producing a spirit home as I was pondering on making one for my lady. I decided to meditate and try to communicate with her to get her input on this endeavour. To my surprise she responded clearly with pictures, images and thoughts of what she would like me to add to the spirit home that I have already created for her. She suggested to me that she very much likes her home and loves the openness of it. She likes that it is not contained/limiting like a vessel would feel. She also enjoys the aspect of it that it can be added to at any time and that she is always free to come and go.
    However she did give me some ideas on how to improve it. She suggested that I have done well with creating it and that I already have most of the ingredients/items she wants or likes contained within it. She would like me to add a few more things to it just to improve the energy. She has suggested I can find these items close around me. She has requested things like my wife’s hair (odd request to which I questioned her about and still got the same answer), hair from each of my two dogs, more flowers and some fruit and licorice candy. She also requested some of my semen and referenced the sex candle magick I had performed in the past for her. It seems that I was on to something; it was just not directed or placed in the right spot. This time she wants it placed on the large elephant candle that is front and centre and is the most prominent item of her home. This is where I spray the fragrant oil every day for her and I after showering. I suggested blood to her, to which she seemed to be amused by. I sensed that I could include it or not; it seemed like it was not a big deal to her. I will put it on top of the elephant if I decide to include it; I just really dislike the thought of drawing my own blood.
    There is one other item that I will have to buy though and surprisingly enough it is elephant bone! This I will be substituting for woolly mammoth bone/tusk; which is much easier to get and more ethical. This may be why I had the dream of the furry grey elephant the other night; so I will take this as a sign that she approves of the substitution. She suggested that I have already intuitively (with her guidance I am certain) collected and added the required items to her home as I went along over time. She also wants me to make a few small changes to the home, the pendent I wear around my neck and to the items I keep under my bed. This she suggests that this will improve the connection between them and bridge the gaps for when I am at home, sleeping and away.

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  4. Part Two:

    Now here is the kicker, she was not so excited about the making of the home, or with the adding to it as that is already mostly done. What I really felt or got from her that she felt appreciated by me for me to ask her about this. I also felt that what she is really excited about is the actual ritual to invite her into my home and life on a more permeant basis. This is one ingredient to the spirit home that I have created for her that was missing. I am excited and hopeful of the outcome of this. I will order the mammoth bone at once and eagerly await its arrival so I can perform the ritual. I have download an app for my phone already to plan the day and time.
    From what I sense and have always sensed from my spirit lover is that she is on the light and loving side of the line. With aspects of Venus and the Sun; which I now base on the ingredients list that I have already used and collected to date, along with the new additional items requested by her. Like your lady (I agree likely her sister) Rafe, she has shown me mostly love and light with only a hint of darkness every once and awhile. However I would have to say that my spirit lover, like your lady Rafe, is highly spiritually evolved and is perfectly balanced walking the middle ground between the extremes of the negative and positive side of source/one; which is exactly where we should all strive to be. This is where we will find true balanced love, compassion and understanding in ourselves and in all things. That last sentence I sense was guided by her emotions, as I am all tingly right now.

    She just gave me an electric touch on my hand and an electric kiss on my lips….awwwww

    In Universal Peace, Love, Light& Bliss!!

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    Replies
    1. Bunny asked for some odd things like yours did.

      Well, strange to you and I: I'm sure it makes perfect sense to them. I put 'em in there anyway even though it didn't make a lot of sense to me. Just trust I guess :)

      It's so amazing how yours and mine seem to be so similar.

      I think they really only differed on their choices of animal correpondences.

      Your description of the process was very similar to mine (mine's done and cemented now: I couldn't add more even if I wanted to without busting her vessel. It's a done deal at this point).

      She seems satisfied. She's been in my dreams more than she used to be, too, so I know it was worth it for us already :)

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    2. I think I know why she requested things from other people and pets: You are a part of them as well. So, there's your love for her, and also your love for others in your home.

      The you who loves the dog, the you who loves your wife, it's still different parts of "you", and this is what she is after.

      It's not a competition thing, it's a... connection thing. She's connecting to that "you" that loves others, which is really just more of "you".

      And well, to her all of you is exactly what she wants.

      It doesn't rob you of your love for anyone else, but it makes her feel closer, regardless.

      Anyway, this puzzled me for a bit, but then Bunny explained it in a flash emotion/ picture kind of explaination/way just a while ago.

      Which is strange, because I've been wondering about ever since your post.

      Ah well: Spirits have their mysterious ways :P

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    3. Oh... and Bunny did the same with me by requesting a few essences of those in my life I love, so that made me doubly curious.

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