Although they both were quite amused I that I made an alternate choice, I suddenly began getting nightmares.
That's a sure sign of a displeased succubus.
So, my dallying with the sexual tulpamancy done with (and one sexual tulpa in her first days of existence later), it's time to turn back to what I was told to do.
I'm now on the first step. Boring, but I don't want nightmares anymore.
Now, there are those who say it's wrong to send me nightmares and I would say well... kinda, but I rather signed on for this and Lady's just doing whatever it takes to bring me back in line.
It's really hard to explain... it just is what it is. Plus I did kinda tell them to fuck off. Haha. Ahahaha.
Here it is. All those nightmares or study this book... which I have already started.
If I really wanted to quit doing this kind of stuff I'd send them on their way. But I'm not done playing with them yet, and I rather doubt that I'll ever be done.
I've often wondered why it matters that I study magick down here if and when I die it won't matter anymore to me. But, what if it's like running a marathon with a gas mask on?
What if it's like swimming with arm and leg weights?
Maybe THAT'S the point, I don't know.
Just for fun... my sexual tulpa: She loves clothes and shoes. I didn't teach her that. Heh. It's cute actually. Every time I call her over she's in different clothes. Like, being an astral being... who's closet is she raiding/getting ideas from? It ain't mine.
I think both Lady and Erin are amused by Miriam (the name of my sexual tulpa) and let her be. I wonder if they'll teach her stuff? Oh man that could be bad. Although... maybe that's where the "astral clothes" she keeps showing up in are coming from hahaha.
You know, after thinking about it... a few posts ago Lady instructed me that we are gods. Since I took that to heart I went and created a tulpa... maybe that's the amusement for the succubi in that I acted from exactly what I was told...
Blessings,
Rafe GB.
Erin...
Half angel, Half demon, All woman.
It's interesting to know your ladies doesn't mind with your tulpa, or probably they let it slide since it's the fruit of your work??
ReplyDeleteMost likely the latter I would imagine. After all if we're really gods inside what do gods do? Create what we can.
DeleteHi rafe. Same guy from the other day btw. You know when I mentioned my succubus problems? As it turns out the entity that's been with me for 2 years has played me like a fiddle.
DeleteIt's not a succubus at all, but a astral parasite that from how the physical touches have felt. Is some pest with tentacles (at first I thought it was just hands that I couldn't percive. I was just wondering if you've experienced similar issues at any point? Since the realisation I've felt uneasy thinking about it.
I suppose the sudden certainty and realisation is my only proof as well the fact that I never actually done any rituals. I sort of hoped that (due to particular circumstances) if I just put my thoughts out there, something would come (I couldn't concieve the idea til I did some research).
Wow that's a trip!
DeleteI've had an astral spider before. It went away on it's own but stuck around for about a month or so. Creepy stuff feeling that thing crawling all over you and yet you can't "touch" it.