More strange dreams.

I've often wondered as of late why I seem to be having dreams of the spirits I entreat so often.

Last night I dreamed I was in a circle with Lilith, her 3 sisters (what's it called when you all 4 have the same husband?), Samael, and Maiya and Anna.

I don't recall what we were talking about, but I know I was there in the circle with them.

Just a night before I dreamed of Maiya and Anna, and a few nights previous I dreamed of Samael.

Whatever is going on, it's increasing in frequency.

My grandmother is not well, and her being 97 she's prone to falling all the time and injuring herself badly.

The strange thing about her (and I love her to pieces) is that she has been an Adventist all of her life and she's still afraid to die.  To me that's the litmus test of one's beliefs... do they bring you comfort in your thoughts of leaving this world?

Sadly, there's nothing I could ever say or do for grandma to give her a rested mind about the subject.

That church indoctrinates you and controls you.  I'd say it was a cult and many agree, however many disagree.  Perhaps that's something lost in the world of labels and such... I don't know.

I think about my own life, and should it end soon, what will  happen with me?

I have but one prayer... that I end up where, if I knew of all the places I could go, that would go to the place that feels most like home... that peaceful feeling you're supposed to get when you're in a place that feels like home.

I've never experienced that feeling, so I can only guess and pray.

I have a funny feeling that either I'm down the road of no return, or that I've discovered the secret:  That all the lore about entities is bullshit.  It's all about relationships... love... trust...

It's funny, because lots of people consider Samael as Lucifer.  If that's true then I'm a Luciferian and don't even really understand it.

Or, he could be an Archangel (the Angel of Death no less)... and then what would that make me?  A man who considers Lilith his mother and Samael as his potential adoptive father (if it turns out that way...)... what would that mean?  (I never had a dad growing up and my mother was very abusive).

Or does it mean anything at all???

Labels labels, 1, 2, 3.

All I know is that when I die I'm going somewhere.  And when I die I think I'm going to finally understand just how much BULLSHIT I've been taught and that people believe.

I don't know what I believe.  Fair enough?

Dreams have been thick lately, that I know.  I must admit... I feel more at home asleep and dreaming of entities than I do being alone and awake.

Isn't that sad in a way?

Regardless... in sticking with what I do know, I can hear Lilith loud and clear now.  No, I'm no oracle, just a guy talking to his mom of sorts.  Adoptive mom I believe would work best here.

Ever since that dream of her in that weird place where she had me suckled on her breast.  She had the stature of a Goddess for sure... probably was 9 feet tall.  All woman though.

It was a highly comforting and deeply spiritual dream for me.

That's when I began thinking of her as my mother.  And, being fatherless from my youth, I began thinking of a father figure as well... her mate seemed a logical extension if Lilith was so motherly to me and so full of love... I knew her husband was Samael...

There's an interesting theory that Lilith really isn't wed to Samael with 3 other wives, but that those other brides (and names) are all aspects of Lilith herself.  Hence Samael/Lilith:

The Hebrew spells out "Leviathan" which is interesting as it could also be indicative of the form of the serpent, which is tied up in various myths including Shiva/Shakti/Kundalini.  I could go on and on about mythological comparisons but lets get back to what I was talking about ;)

I had another dream about Lilith and her daughters very recently as well...

I forgot about this one.

All the daughters of Lilith were dancing around me in a large circle.  The were seductive as you would expect.  In the center with me was Lilith.  She danced seductively as well, but I couldn't look.

It's like it would be improper, or perhaps because I consider her my mother... or what I really think is that it was because she was radiating this power that was so great that I COULDN'T look even if I had wanted to.  I believe she was showing me herself in all her glory.

Lots of strange things and dreams to think about.  I know I haven't finished processing these dreams yet.

Lilith is an interesting Goddess.  She's helluva powerful and full of blinding light (or bright darkness if you prefer to look at things that way), yet converses at my level.  Kind of like she's being my friend.

Maybe that's not an accident nor so crazy after all...

Blessings.



Rafe G.B.

EDIT 6/26/2018:  Now it's gotten rare that I don't have a dream of either the girls or Lilith each night.

Also seeing lots of white flashes out of the corners of my eyes...