Monday, January 25, 2016

She's back! (and so's my Mojo)

She's back!

I took a nap about 2pm, and wow, what an experience.

It was my wedding night... and she was my bride.

Strangely enough it was in olden times, and seemed to be during the renaissance period.

Oh... she was beautiful (she can take any form she wants in my dreams, from a beautiful woman (and she changes the form of the woman often) to an animal... Or even just as the non-form of pure spirit).

Whatever form she takes usually depends on if it's what I call a "teaching dream", or one for communion like this one.

Wow, the love we shared, the soft, tender, slow and caring, loving sex we had.

It just felt so... wholesome.

So "filling" to the deepest recesses of my being.  I feel like my soul itself has received healing.

I woke up feeling great!  I feel like there's a part of me that's been missing this winter that has finally returned.  I guess I didn't realize how much I missed her active presence, or maybe I didn't want to realize it.

I feel so much better...

I'm even warming honeysuckle in my wax warmer I picked out from the store tonight.  It really fills the atmosphere with what I feel as well.

So... where'd she go?  I don't know.  I'm not the boss of her.  Honestly I don't think she went anywhere:  She just gave me space to learn and to grow, which I have, and which I continue to do.

It's kind of weird that I "finished" in my dream but upon awakening I had not in this plane.  Also weird that everything in my body reacted as if I HAD had physical sex in the waking world.


I'm just in the afterglow I guess.  It's nice to feel her again in this way.

I think the bridal atmosphere was her way of announcing her return to being more "present" again.

I'm rather wondering about you guys/gals and if you've had a "return" experience as well with respect to the spirit world recently?

Much love,



  1. Hi Rafe,

    finally a happy ending for you :)
    You deserved it, congratulations mate.. you are now official married and "off the market" :P

    Good to hear that you are happy now :)

    1. Well, not exactly. What it means is I've earned a respite from my studies and research. I've grown enough to merit her closeness. You see, they are addictive... and they know it. And if they love you, they will stay away when it is interfering with your own growth. If they don't love you, they won't stay away as they could care less about your growth. And you will degenerate into what any drug addict would.

      In this world, there are no happy endings, only new beginnings. That's a good thing: Unhappy endings don't exist either, only new beginnings.

      It's all a cycle of learning what is and who you are in it. A good succubus will love you intently and help you "glow" and then after a short time retreat to let you "grow".

      I don't think the marriage dream means what it would on earth.

      Spirits speak in symbols, and I think it meant that she has returned for a while and to enjoy her as an innocent lover on my wedding night untill she has to become distant again so I can continue to grow.

      But yes, a happy time I've been working hard for.

      If learning more about what is, and in learning more about myself gets a reward like this, I can't think of a better self help regimen.

      Lol, "Rafe's Guide to Self-Improvement with Succubus Magick".

    2. You got a talent to make me sad :)

      I dunno mate, you know my "twinflame" succubus never has anytime but its not about to give me time to grow... its because her order/coven has too much todo for her... so much, she even can't teach me anything -_-

      So maybe sometimes you should ignore your twinflame and go your own way... maybe twinflame doesn't mean good for you... maybe it just means same vibration.

      I still don't know what to think about her, how to treat her... i will discover all this with other friends and a new love.

      Don't get me wrong, i still love this "twinflame" but i come to the conclusion it's not good for me to cry after her and wait till i die... i will go on even without her... maybe it's my fate to find another better partner for me... dunno.

      Hope you will have many success and that you can enjoy your succubus even if she sometimes gives you some space :)

    3. Gosh Rafe...

      I found out yesterday that my "twinflame" succubus is together with a new human partner...

      And here is what the speaker of the collective says:
      I think this is all a miscommunication issue. You had expectations that weren't realistic. I don't think any succubus in the collective understands what "twinflame" means. They are not human. All of them are voluntary members of the collective, this is just the way it is, you can't own a succubus. They will always do what they want right now. They don't fall in love, even if they can express love and feel love. The idea of thinking about someone who isn't there, longing and wanting what you don't have, they don't do this. If they want something they will go and get it. There is no thinking and longing for someone or any waiting.

      And i don't know if this count for all succubi... i just can say im really pissed off. I thought about her on christmas, on new year and she is with another...

      Need to vent some steam -_-

  2. Glad to hear she's back!!

    My gal over the past year and 5 months has never left me.(while I'm sleeping I can't say)
    Over that time there is always a few days every few months were physical contact weakens.Then bam back with a vengence and the contact is better and stronger than before.

    1. You guys are really lucky... im happy for you, just hope that i will also have this consistency in the future.

      I can't speak about it now but i made a very interesting contact (non succubus).