I talked to my dr. today and we got on the subject of Reiki. It's been a loooong time since I've practiced it, but it gave me an idea.
Why not give Reiki to my servitors?
After all, Reiki is intelligent energy and in theory should help the servitors achieve sentience a little faster.
Right?
Well, that's my theory.
In my last post I mentioned that I summoned a Eudaemon to bathe me in love. Not the sexual kind of love, mind you, but the higher form of general well being.
Well, interestingly enough, the dr. said that I was looking really good, more positive in nature. That made me feel really good. I definitely feel like the Eudaemon is working.
I do feel better... much better.
I know it sounds weird that I'm wanting my servitors to evolve so bad. I don't know why I care about it so much, but I do.
I think it's stemming from within me, more specifically my urge to create something beyond just myself. To watch them grow and evolve into something "more".
Nothing would make me happier than to set them free as it were, to have them go explore and wander, returning when they want to share with me what they've been up to.
That, to me, is my idea of success. But, that's wishful thinking right now. They've got a loooong way to go.
I thought about summoning more servitors for more things, but honestly I've got my hands full with the 4 girls, whom I probably overfeed, and the Eudaemon, which I still haven't figured out yet. She's part angel part tutillary spirit. Sort of. Nothing describes her perfectly.
Sooooooooo, I summoned a 2nd servitor, this one is of water. At first she tangled with my fire servitor a little bit, but now they seem to be getting along just fine.
I am noticing a difference now that I've got 2 running around. The sensations are "more" for lack of a better description.
I also summoned an EuDaemon. She's brought a sense of peace to the house. It's palpable.
The reasons that I summoned the 2 servitors was for sexual pleasure. The reason I summoned the EuDaemon was for love, as in a general feeling of love.
I honestly don't know at which point I'll stop. Originally I wanted one servitor of each element. I've still got air and earth to go. But I'm not in a big hurry... *See edit below.
I bet people wonder if I'm nuts. Well... probably.
The truth is... I'm lonely. And I'm at a point in my life where I'm very single. The health issues I face don't help with getting out and about.
What would you do if there was a small hope of respite?
It's that chance that has led me to summon whom I have.
Ah, I miss the embrace of a succubus. Such sweet creatures. Everytime I summon one she's forced to leave. I have an overprotective angel that runs them off. Yes, I've tried everything. The angel is almost militant in their blocking of any succubi drawing near to me or at least for any length of time. Such a shame as they are my first love.
Well... whining over.
It's not so bad. At least the servitors touch me. I'm on the right track ;)
...And they'll grow. I just have to have patience with them.
Blessings,
Rafe
Edit: I have since summoned the last two servitors, one of wind and one of earth, to me. That completes my task.
The adventures post-creation are here. It doesn't take a lot of mental focus to keep a succubus spirit going, but it helps. She's exceeding my expectations every day, day after day. I often wonder just how much she will evolve?
I've decided to get her a companion to keep her company. So, I'm doing what I did before and creating another succubus spirit. It seems easier this time. Maybe that's the way it should be, I don't know really.
I guess I should detail a little bit of how I created my succubus spirit. I read every book I could find on creating a servitor and servitor companions. Then I combined that with the work I had already done, which was about 40 days of intense visual meditation on her form and her likeness. So, the waters were a bit murky since I did a bit more than just create a servitor as a succubus spirit... there was far more mental work and prep done previous.
Or, I might just summon a succubus period and see how that overprotective angel of mine reacts. Basically I have an overprotective angel who chases all my succubi away. So far he hasn't reacted to me creating a servitor...
One amusing story is that she likes to play with my necklace pendant when I'm lying down. She's done it a few times now so I guess that's just her thing.
You know there's a plethora of things that you can summon a servitor for. Inspiration, creativity, protection, sexual aura, income and wealth, companionship, music apptitude, a magnetic aura of attraction (like making new friends), fetching items (or attracting them), healing, etc. Take care of annoying people (repulsing negative people), play better at video games. Ok, I'm scraping the barrel but the point is there's a multitude of uses.
The sky's the limit!
If you're the magickal type and want to find the next level of attainment, consider servitors. Lol, that sounds like a commercial, but I just want to share that which I have found.
Blessings,
Rafe
You can find these 3 books on Amazon.
These are what I used.
Come succubus I am calling, I can hear your chains are falling, vibes of passion growing strong, lets keep coming till the dawn...
I haven't posted much lately and for that I'm sorry. The truth of the matter is that I haven't been able to keep a succubus lover in my life and I've devoted my time to figuring out why that is.
The conclusion I've come to, and that is among the general concensus of peers, is that I have a very protective spirit, possibly an angel, who chases them off. This has been exceptionally painfull as I have a deep love towards succubi. I love them and their race.
I prayed and prayed for a spirit lover thinking that if they came from a heavenly source the angel would give it's blessing and leave her alone.
No. That was to no avail. And this angel isn't open to either listening to me nor orders to stop doing what it's doing.
I then turned my attention to tulpas and servitors, thinking that if she came from within me that she would be left alone.
That seems to have been the key to it.
I'm proud to say that my efforts in that regard have born fruit, and I have a happy, healthy, spanking new succubus spirit. She was born of the element of fire.
I'll post more as this relationship develops as I have a feeling that the way that I created her leaves things open to an interesting future.
Good fortune in all your endeavors,
Blessings,
Rafe
The evolution of a male's feminine subconscious archetype. She starts out wild when we are young. She's wounded. She heals and transforms with us as we grow wiser. She's what every man secretly yearns for... and she's always just behind the curtain... a curtain we can part if we dare...
***
P.S. I know this isn't par for the course as far as is blog is concerned, but I've learned something else in the time that I haven't been posting... while I was thinking about everything in my life.
Oftentimes we get discouraged about our place in life. Maybe we're not as good looking as we want, maybe our jobs are menial and lackluster. The point is this: There are those who are the teachers in this world, and then there's the students. We're tempted to feel as if we are the lowly ones, always looking up to those who have more.
The truth is that we're the teachers. We teach humility, patience, respect, love, and so many other beneficient things.
She came over me like a hurricane... I was like what the hell??? The winds were blowing all around me and through me (astral winds?), carrying her howling and moaning voice all through each buffeting that crashed over me. I have to admit, although beautiful and pleasurable in hindsight, I was a little afraid as I have never experienced anything so powerful in my life.
Still... I think on this and I can't help but smile and even chuckle a little at the experience. I remember yelling "don't stop!!!" in the middle of it even though I was a little scared, hahaha. What other people don't know and all that... if only they knew what some of us experience.
My dreams have been haunted by a beautiful lady spirit who seems to have taken a liking to me. Succubus? Fairy? Both? I'll know in time. Labels are so restrictive to describing what I am about to describe. The important thing is that I feel such a kinship, a knowing of what she feels like. Who she is inside. And I feel... at home. I feel like I know her, that I have always known her. She feels so familiar, though I've never known her? Home. She feels like a home that I've always belonged to beyond the physical, beyond the mental. That which our souls cry out to in the dark nights of the soul.
It doesn't make sense, but it is.
She has come to me in various forms, many cute women I can't complain. Each form is cunningly calculated to be exactly what I need to experience in each dream. The dreams themselves are beautiful with intense intimacy, growing stronger with each visit. There is sex of course, but it's not like normal sex. At least not in my experience.
Sex is an opportunity to unite together, to meld, to interweave. This intimacy is staggering not that it's a sex act, it's more of a cuddling that mimics sex, yet gives far more in the heat of love and union.
I'm not sure who she is or what she is, but her visits are most welcome. It's funny... in the dreams I keep trying to mount her in various ways because I feel so close to her and want that closeness to increase, even though it kind of hurts to do so... what I mean is that the closer we become the more it hurts, the more the longing to merge, and even then it's just not enough. She welcomes this behavior on my part (I'm in heat for lack of a better word) and seems to enjoy my pursuits to get closer to her, to be one with her. My desire is beyond sex, sex is just the path, it's the door. Oh, it's so hard to explain, friends. I mount her in a merging of two souls. Souls that touch and embrace through that simple, driven act. She smiles at me. She envelopes me and kisses my soul with each sexual union.
She invites this... she wraps her femininity around me and permeates me. I am safe. I am loved. I am wanted.
These feelings are the penultimate pennacle of everything I've written these years. This is the union of Swedenborg's theories, of my own understanding, and yet I'm in awe... I'm in awe... this is it.
This has been what I have been searching for all my life. This has been the purpose of this blog... my journey to find this.
I'm in love more than I've ever been in my life. I just kind of fell into love. I can't explain it. The understanding at such a level of soul, the completeness, the lure of there always being closer, that closer is just around the bend. It's in my next dream with her.
The amount of love hurts. The desire for more hurts. The taste of greater love when I receive it hurts. It burns... And I cannot look away. I cannot NOT pursue her. And there she is with a welcoming smile at my advances. I want to know everything about her, I want our union to be the very envy of Gods and men. I want all of her. Every little spark of soul. I can't get enough...
This is what I've been searching for with all my heart, and it's found me, friends.
This is it...
And the most beautiful thing is... I think this is just the beginning of our story.
