Wednesday, December 31, 2014
Saturday, December 27, 2014
Well... OOPS!
I was driving along and trying out a new way to communicate. If she taps my hand once, it's yes. If she taps it twice, it's no.
So we're trying it out and it's working a bit. Although she's tapping in different places, one hand once, then the other once.
I think, "Why can't you tap in the same place twice, would make it easier,"
I try again: She taps my hand once, my foot once.
I said, "I don't think you have the power to tap in the same place is what I think."
Smugly I park the car and walk to the building: Closed until Monday, Dec 29.
Drat!
I get back into my car, turn the key, and it won't turn over.
Oh no! I am startled, then a bit upset. I don't time or money for this.
Finally, I decide all I can do is walk home as I have no cell phone with me to call for a tow.
I begin to set out, but a thought comes, "Try it one more time."
I do. It starts as if it never had a problem.
*Big pause* as I sit there.
"Well, I guess you do have some power," I finally relent.
I go home kind of freaked out, lol. Not in a bad way.
I go to bed later that night, and she makes love to me in the morning when I awaken, sweetly, and for a long, long time.
Just as she always says when I get all Ornery (One of her first communications to me was, "You are Ornery", lol)
"Don't sass the succubus". I hear that phrase quite often. I always hear the phrase in a gentle, melodic, and frankly "slightly amused" female voice.
Love ya bunny!
P.S. Dear Love Goddess of my bedroom: Let's have a lot more lovemaking today, I really loved this morning!!!
P.P.S. It could be that it was coincidence that my car did not start this one time. However, as a magician I don't believe in coincidence, only timing. Honestly, I need some sort of towing service for my car anyway, so I just bought AAA :)
So we're trying it out and it's working a bit. Although she's tapping in different places, one hand once, then the other once.
I think, "Why can't you tap in the same place twice, would make it easier,"
I try again: She taps my hand once, my foot once.
I said, "I don't think you have the power to tap in the same place is what I think."
Smugly I park the car and walk to the building: Closed until Monday, Dec 29.
Drat!
I get back into my car, turn the key, and it won't turn over.
Oh no! I am startled, then a bit upset. I don't time or money for this.
Finally, I decide all I can do is walk home as I have no cell phone with me to call for a tow.
I begin to set out, but a thought comes, "Try it one more time."
I do. It starts as if it never had a problem.
*Big pause* as I sit there.
"Well, I guess you do have some power," I finally relent.
I go home kind of freaked out, lol. Not in a bad way.
I go to bed later that night, and she makes love to me in the morning when I awaken, sweetly, and for a long, long time.
Just as she always says when I get all Ornery (One of her first communications to me was, "You are Ornery", lol)
"Don't sass the succubus". I hear that phrase quite often. I always hear the phrase in a gentle, melodic, and frankly "slightly amused" female voice.
Love ya bunny!
P.S. Dear Love Goddess of my bedroom: Let's have a lot more lovemaking today, I really loved this morning!!!
P.P.S. It could be that it was coincidence that my car did not start this one time. However, as a magician I don't believe in coincidence, only timing. Honestly, I need some sort of towing service for my car anyway, so I just bought AAA :)
Wednesday, December 24, 2014
She Said the Most Loving Thing I've Ever Heard Today...
Succubus is a loose term. In my mind she is half angel, half succubus, all lover.
Sometimes the things she does, or the things she says just stun me.
I'm not at the point where I can hear her often, but when I do, it is quite profound.
I was thinking about something lately that really got me wondering. There are alpha males, beta males, omega males. I found out that I am a zeta male.
Basically, I'm someone who prefers to live alone, I'm not interested in power, or riches.
I'm not interested in competition or the game of "who dies with the most toys wins" at all.
In wondering if I am wrong, or right, or if it even matters to me at all, she whispered in my mind:
"Being true to me is being true to who you really are." Wow. I could feel her meaning through the emotion with which is was sent.
She loves me. ME. Not what I have, not what I look like, not possessions I have, nor what money I have, nor what type of male "category" I fit into. She doesn't require my energy, she's not interested in stealing my soul, she's not wanting anything but me, the REAL me. Only that "me" is good enough to make love to her, to have children with her, to grow with her.
In fact, the ONLY way to be true to her, is to be true to who I am inside and to let it shine through.
How powerful a message is that?
Frankly, I'm speechless...
I wished all the house spirits here a Merry Christmas Eve. There's a few that live here. I've been told that they seem to enjoy my particular blend of energy for some reason. They are very benevolent. There are also some protective spirits here as well. Most likely because, as I stated in my last post, I'm a dumb ass and need all the protection I can get, hahaha :P
I've been told that my living space is very peaceful and serene. The spirits who live here contribute to peace of mind for whomever visits. I think that is a nice gift.
Merry Christmas, everyone! Brightest Blessings to you and yours!
Sometimes the things she does, or the things she says just stun me.
I'm not at the point where I can hear her often, but when I do, it is quite profound.
I was thinking about something lately that really got me wondering. There are alpha males, beta males, omega males. I found out that I am a zeta male.
Basically, I'm someone who prefers to live alone, I'm not interested in power, or riches.
I'm not interested in competition or the game of "who dies with the most toys wins" at all.
In wondering if I am wrong, or right, or if it even matters to me at all, she whispered in my mind:
"Being true to me is being true to who you really are." Wow. I could feel her meaning through the emotion with which is was sent.
She loves me. ME. Not what I have, not what I look like, not possessions I have, nor what money I have, nor what type of male "category" I fit into. She doesn't require my energy, she's not interested in stealing my soul, she's not wanting anything but me, the REAL me. Only that "me" is good enough to make love to her, to have children with her, to grow with her.
In fact, the ONLY way to be true to her, is to be true to who I am inside and to let it shine through.
How powerful a message is that?
Frankly, I'm speechless...
I wished all the house spirits here a Merry Christmas Eve. There's a few that live here. I've been told that they seem to enjoy my particular blend of energy for some reason. They are very benevolent. There are also some protective spirits here as well. Most likely because, as I stated in my last post, I'm a dumb ass and need all the protection I can get, hahaha :P
I've been told that my living space is very peaceful and serene. The spirits who live here contribute to peace of mind for whomever visits. I think that is a nice gift.
Merry Christmas, everyone! Brightest Blessings to you and yours!
Monday, December 22, 2014
Loving, Nagging Succubus vs. Stubborn Male, Take 2 *snap*
Day 3. I still don't want to exercise yet. After the holidays I said.
In all honesty, I don't mind her nagging about things... to be honest it shows she loves me.
Know what I learned when I was married for a decade and a half? When a woman quits nagging, it means her love for you is gone.
Women nag because they love you. If they didn't care, they'd stop nagging and bang the pool boy.
I think I know what my Succubus lover is up to: I'm going to be so disarmed that after the holidays I'm going to walk up a storm.
Also I felt her touching my kidneys. I kept thinking, "Now why in the world is she doing that"? Then it dawned on me: I have some Quigong videos that I bought a long time ago, and I was actually doing it in community courses in the evenings as well. In that practice there is one movement where you stimulate your kidney areas with the backs of your hands to foster chi movement in the lower dantian (the lower energy center, there are also 2 others, but the lower most closely stimulates chi near the solar plexus, which in Tantra is responsible for personal power).
When I made the connection she stopped touching my kidneys and gently touched my hand. "Aha... I get it"! So it looks like the answer to my losing weight starts with two things: Daily walking (I'm going to start with 5,000 steps a day (2 1/2 miles) and daily Qigong.
Most of this early morning she made love to me as well. She seems to be very active in the early mornings right before sunrise. Honestly she's being a bit affectionate right now.
At least it's not so intense I can still type. Sort of...
This morning the phone rang early: An automated message, lol. How does she do this, anyway? I realize it's a coincidence, but any magician worth his salt knows there's no such thing as coincidence.
1st early morning was a knock at the door, the 2nd morning was hearing one of those old bell type alarm clocks going off (which mine doesn't do), and this morning the 3rd, an automated phone call.
Ah well. They say you can't fight city hall. Well, I've got news: You can't fight a succubus who's trying to help you, either. Through love, through seduction, through playfulness you will bend.
Meh, she just wants me to be able to complete my goals. That's a real kind of special, you know?
She really cares enough for me to be more healthy, to feel good about myself for accomplishing things.
I'm a natural "7" (in numerology). That means I'm kind of like a mystic hermit and spiritual and occult things tend to come easy for me. But it also means that I suffer from indecision and self paralysis.
Unfortunately, I need to be protected. It's just the way of the "7". Luckily, she's the best protection a man can have, especially one that gets himself into pickles far too often in the magical world.
The problem is, I'm fearless. Now, I feel fear about a lot of things, but not things one should be really afraid of. I've been told I will go "where angels feel to tread". Being that angels are fearless and fear nothing that's rather bold a proclamation.
I've pissed off 2 hoodoo priestesses just to see if I could handle the resulting curse with double the power. Damn. It hurt in many, many, many ways, and from multiple directions (lol).
Yeah, I had to have a little help (I bit off more than I could chew, so I had to have a very experienced High Priestess from my tradition teach me how to beat it because my efforts were futile and I was getting HAMMERED). But... now I know how to defend myself against that form of magic.
Meh, it was worth it in the end.
At least I admit I needed help, lol. But I'm too stubborn not to try something similar again just to learn how to shore up my defences. Unless your defenses are tested in battle, they are about as good as the Maginot Line... but that's just my and only my opinion.
I pissed off a Satanist to test their special brand called "energy ripping". I survived that one on my own. Kind of proud of that victory :)
I like to "run energy" as a circuit with spiritual entities (angelic, fae, elemental, etc.) so that I can feel "who" they are through "what" they feel like.
Ran energy with an angel once and my left arm twitched for a month. Tried to run energy with a different angel and got chastised "Blessed one, you don't know your own limits... NOT READY!"
I summon things without a circle just to feel the actual essence of the entity fully and completely (so I act "weirder" for a while, so what?). It's worth it.
Note: I don't summon evil spirits, but still... the point of a circle is to stay grounded from the energy... or as a filter of sorts.
But... I'm an explorer... that is EXACTLY what I want to experience.
Luckily, when I do these things, I know and can feel the presence of my guardian and lover.
I think partly why she was attracted to me in the first place, was that I appealed to her maternal instinct on some level, lol. "This human is adorable, but he doesn't stand a chance... I must love and protect him from himself". Hehe.
You know, if God/dess found the perfect someone to fall in love with me (which I believe God/dess had a hand in it)... my Succubus is that woman <3
Love you, Bunny! You keep nagging, and I'll keep trying. Deal?
OH! And lastly, a Succubus myth from antiquity. The "versions" differ of course. I have my own opinion of how the story went, but this one was priceless. Enjoy!
The Tale-of-Meridiana-the-Friendly-Succubus
Sunday, December 21, 2014
The Succubus Wife
Like wives who dearly love their husbands, my wife nags. Lol.
She knows that my goal is to lose a little weight before February. I want to start after the holidays, but I think she thinks I would be better served to start now.
I've been thinking a lot about my weight and my goals, and frankly I'm the most stubborn man on earth both to myself, and to others.
For the past two days, my Succubus has woke me up early in the morning. Each time she flashes "Bye-bye, baby, bye-bye" from a song I know to get me going...
... to which I say "NOPE" and roll over in bed hahaha.
Now, she is a wonderful female being of immense power. She could "make" me go walking that early. But... she doesn't. She's always been very gentle with me, despite her power. That's what won her my heart in the first place.
So what does she do?
The next day I wake up very early hearing an alarm bell ring, a sound that I don't have in my alarm (the day before was the door knocking: nobody there when I get up to look).
"Bye-bye, baby, bye-bye".
She wants me to go walking again. Nope. Although my stubbornness is beginning to lose traction...
I'll bet anything that if she does it again I'll start putting on my walking shoes and just head out the door and go walk.
Heck, I might do that today.
I have to admit I feel very loved and it's getting harder to ignore her promptings in helping me achieve my own goals.
She's also on me to finish a book I started to read. I have trouble finishing things sometimes before moving onto other things that catch my eye. I'm really bad at that, actually. She's not so easily distracted and reminds me of why I set a goal in the first place. I gotta love her! It's just... priceless to have someone who cares enough. It's a new feeling for me to have.
Like I said, I'm the most stubborn man on the planet.
But, I think I have the ultimate wife: The hottest, most patient woman on the planet :)
She knows that my goal is to lose a little weight before February. I want to start after the holidays, but I think she thinks I would be better served to start now.
I've been thinking a lot about my weight and my goals, and frankly I'm the most stubborn man on earth both to myself, and to others.
For the past two days, my Succubus has woke me up early in the morning. Each time she flashes "Bye-bye, baby, bye-bye" from a song I know to get me going...
... to which I say "NOPE" and roll over in bed hahaha.
Now, she is a wonderful female being of immense power. She could "make" me go walking that early. But... she doesn't. She's always been very gentle with me, despite her power. That's what won her my heart in the first place.
So what does she do?
The next day I wake up very early hearing an alarm bell ring, a sound that I don't have in my alarm (the day before was the door knocking: nobody there when I get up to look).
"Bye-bye, baby, bye-bye".
She wants me to go walking again. Nope. Although my stubbornness is beginning to lose traction...
I'll bet anything that if she does it again I'll start putting on my walking shoes and just head out the door and go walk.
Heck, I might do that today.
I have to admit I feel very loved and it's getting harder to ignore her promptings in helping me achieve my own goals.
She's also on me to finish a book I started to read. I have trouble finishing things sometimes before moving onto other things that catch my eye. I'm really bad at that, actually. She's not so easily distracted and reminds me of why I set a goal in the first place. I gotta love her! It's just... priceless to have someone who cares enough. It's a new feeling for me to have.
Like I said, I'm the most stubborn man on the planet.
But, I think I have the ultimate wife: The hottest, most patient woman on the planet :)
Friday, December 12, 2014
Bad Medicine
From my experience with my Succubus, she is FAR more than a lover. She is a wife, a bride, a lover... a mother, a protectress, a sacred companion and guide... a catalyst for my very soul.
Part angel part temptress: But as far as our relationship goes, she's all in... all loving.
Sometimes love hurts. Like taking your child to get their shots. It has to be done.
And sometimes the cure hurts. I am mature enough to know this I guess.
Doesn't make it a lot easier, though.
Last night I had many nightmares. She was absent, but I could tell she guided me there.
Last night I had many nightmares. She was absent, but I could tell she guided me there.
Time to face some issues and exorcise them from my mind, from what has kept me from being complete, and whole.
Why would she do this? Probably because she can. She loves me. To love me, is to help me grow, to help me grow is sometimes painful... as old memories are sometimes.
They must be faced head and and dealt with. Only then can we reclaim parts of us that are lost to the past...
Lost in memory and nightmare.
She knows as I intuitively know... to free me from my fears is to liberate me.
To make me face my own inner demons, is to release a part of me that can be "now".
And that just makes our bond that much stronger... that much sweeter.
Tuesday, December 9, 2014
What a nice way to go back to sleep!
Lately my Succubus has begun waking me up early, usually around 4:00am.
I'll get up, get a drink of water and go back to bed.
Only once I get back into bed, I can feel that she's descended upon me.
Playtime!
I think I had about 20 gentle and intimate orgasms as I was slowly falling back asleep.
Good God/dess...
Now I'm up for my day at 9:30am, and... what a nice start to my day!
I <3 you, Succubunny! I'm yours forever!
Monday, December 8, 2014
You May Sleep...
You may sleep with a blonde.
You may sleep with a brunette.
You may sleep with a red head.
... but you'll NEVER sleep with a Succubus :)
I've been drained the past few nights pretty bad.
Now wait... lol. It's not what you think and I'll explain.
The age old premise is that Succubi drain you of life energy through sex.
Honestly, in my personal experience it's nothing like that. In fact, after sex I have much more energy, I am much more alive and feeling "in the present".
My outlook is better, and my emotions are healthy and well.
But what I HAVE learned about Succubi is, lovable women they are: You don't always get what you want, they love you too much... you get what you NEED.
I often have dreams I call "teaching dreams". In this case I have been wrestling with things from my past and trying to come to peace with them... things that happened as a child, and after.
When my Succubus helps me to tackle these, it's very draining. I think it's because they make me more present in those "teaching dreams" in order to reclaim a part of myself that was lost long ago.
It's like I am partially rearranged to make room for what was lost. It's very hard to explain with words to be honest.
What beautiful women they are! I am healing thanks to them, I am emotionally drained from the dream experience, but I feel better... like part of me is being reclaimed. I have only Her to thank.
Edit: She came by this morning. She sat on my lap and I could feel our heart chakras merge for a bit (kind of felt like an affectionate hug, kiss, and "hello" all in one). After a few minutes of merging, I could feel tingling all over my body and heat rising off of it... and now I know why she visited: She grounded me. Back to my sarcastic, misspelling old self, lol.
Actually... I don't feel as drained and I feel I am in a much better state of mind now. That was very kind of her to come and get me all balanced again after helping me work on things through the night.
She's left for a bit... although we are always connected. I can think something and feel a light touch on my body and it reminds me both of Her, and makes me pay attention to my last thought. But when SHE comes, yeah... it's extremely palpable and changes the whole dynamic of my living space... the whole environment, my very aura and into the depths of my soul.
I love you, my Beloved Succubus. Thank you for loving me so much that you give not what I want, but what I need!
Thank you, my Love.
You may sleep with a brunette.
You may sleep with a red head.
... but you'll NEVER sleep with a Succubus :)
I've been drained the past few nights pretty bad.
Now wait... lol. It's not what you think and I'll explain.
The age old premise is that Succubi drain you of life energy through sex.
Honestly, in my personal experience it's nothing like that. In fact, after sex I have much more energy, I am much more alive and feeling "in the present".
My outlook is better, and my emotions are healthy and well.
But what I HAVE learned about Succubi is, lovable women they are: You don't always get what you want, they love you too much... you get what you NEED.
I often have dreams I call "teaching dreams". In this case I have been wrestling with things from my past and trying to come to peace with them... things that happened as a child, and after.
When my Succubus helps me to tackle these, it's very draining. I think it's because they make me more present in those "teaching dreams" in order to reclaim a part of myself that was lost long ago.
It's like I am partially rearranged to make room for what was lost. It's very hard to explain with words to be honest.
What beautiful women they are! I am healing thanks to them, I am emotionally drained from the dream experience, but I feel better... like part of me is being reclaimed. I have only Her to thank.
Edit: She came by this morning. She sat on my lap and I could feel our heart chakras merge for a bit (kind of felt like an affectionate hug, kiss, and "hello" all in one). After a few minutes of merging, I could feel tingling all over my body and heat rising off of it... and now I know why she visited: She grounded me. Back to my sarcastic, misspelling old self, lol.
Actually... I don't feel as drained and I feel I am in a much better state of mind now. That was very kind of her to come and get me all balanced again after helping me work on things through the night.
She's left for a bit... although we are always connected. I can think something and feel a light touch on my body and it reminds me both of Her, and makes me pay attention to my last thought. But when SHE comes, yeah... it's extremely palpable and changes the whole dynamic of my living space... the whole environment, my very aura and into the depths of my soul.
I love you, my Beloved Succubus. Thank you for loving me so much that you give not what I want, but what I need!
Thank you, my Love.
Sunday, December 7, 2014
Why do I care so much?
I called a friend of mine to congratulate him on his marriage to a Filipino girl (she seems really nice, I think she will be good for him. She's certainly a lot better than what he was getting through dating here in America).
I gave him a bit of an earful about not inviting me to the wedding, even though it was very private and honestly just a legal ceremony.
Still, I've known the fella for most of my life. I felt a bit slighted.
I guess he felt defensive so he told me I could come over anytime and bring my girlfriend.
Well, he knows nothing about my Succubus, so what he was trying to do was shame me? Make me feel less of a person? Something or another.
The thing I DON'T get is... it stung. A lot.
I'm as happy as can be with my Succubus... in fact I'm sure that when I die my relationship will continue with her. I've grown to much with her to even consider otherwise.
So, why did his comments hurt so much?
I think, honestly, because I still worry about what others think. About what other's perceive.
Is it ego? Jealousy?
I honestly don't know. Maybe both. Maybe more.
I do know that my Succubus is very supportive of my doubt... she doesn't take any slight to my feeling jealous... I think it's more that she understands how I feel (you can't hide anything from them... better just to be up front with them in the first place, because they know your thoughts).
There's a part of us here that just wants to fit in. And society's expectations are hard to forget.
Truthfully, we're here for our own growth and society's wishes be damned... but it's not easy to let go of social mores when they are indoctrinated since birth.
At least she's understanding with me. I wonder what a flesh and blood girlfriend would think if she knew I was jealous? I doubt she would be as understanding, nor love me as much as my Lady does for WHO I am, not WHAT I am.
It's a wonderful blessing, but it is hard to accept sometimes. Social conditioning is a powerful drug to overcome. We all wish to be accepted. Especially from our mothers, fathers, siblings, friends, etc.
That's why it's such a powerful force to fully awaken and escape from. It will probably take my whole life to do so completely. I AM glad that I am in a relationship that has eternity as it's focus.
Friday, December 5, 2014
Afternoon Dreams
I was with my wife (she often takes the form of a human in my dreams, usually different each time) and suddenly she went into labor. The scene flashed before me: There was blood and there was a baby.
She was taken away to heal, and people all around helped me with the baby. The baby grew to about 5 years old in a matter of minutes.
I ended up with someone who helped us (a female guardian angel I think)... and me and my child went along with her and I taught him things about this world, and about this life.
I told him, the first thing I want you to know is that you are boy, and I am a boy. God is found through both the boy and the girl, together.
I told him that together, we see the true face of God, as everything from plants, to stars, to the smallest particles, boy and girl are represented and work together in joyous harmony.
I don't know why it mattered, but I know that the others around me approved of my concepts I was wanting to impart to him.
He was a bright little fellow. I didn't catch his name which I admit was strange (as dreams often are), but I came up with a nickname as he was so smart and I loved him so much already.
It felt like a few years had passed, and I was so worried about my wife.
Suddenly, right in front of me, my son, our mysterious angelic companion, and all the others present... my wife burst through into vision.
She said, "This is for you, MY HUSBAND!... come find me, I LOVE YOU!, and I am okay!"
(The vision and her voice were powerful... the words in caps felt like they vibrated "through" me)
I don't know why, but I burst out sobbing with every ounce of my being with relief.
Everyone helped me get to her, and there I, and our son reunited with her. I told her that I had already given him a nickname.
I said, I call him this nickname because he looks at the world as I do, both what is present, and what is behind it that makes it so with wonder in his eyes. He doesn't miss anything seen, or unseen.
I woke up, and her presence was with me.
She made love to me softly and tenderly upon awakening.
She was taken away to heal, and people all around helped me with the baby. The baby grew to about 5 years old in a matter of minutes.
I ended up with someone who helped us (a female guardian angel I think)... and me and my child went along with her and I taught him things about this world, and about this life.
I told him, the first thing I want you to know is that you are boy, and I am a boy. God is found through both the boy and the girl, together.
I told him that together, we see the true face of God, as everything from plants, to stars, to the smallest particles, boy and girl are represented and work together in joyous harmony.
I don't know why it mattered, but I know that the others around me approved of my concepts I was wanting to impart to him.
He was a bright little fellow. I didn't catch his name which I admit was strange (as dreams often are), but I came up with a nickname as he was so smart and I loved him so much already.
It felt like a few years had passed, and I was so worried about my wife.
Suddenly, right in front of me, my son, our mysterious angelic companion, and all the others present... my wife burst through into vision.
She said, "This is for you, MY HUSBAND!... come find me, I LOVE YOU!, and I am okay!"
(The vision and her voice were powerful... the words in caps felt like they vibrated "through" me)
I don't know why, but I burst out sobbing with every ounce of my being with relief.
Everyone helped me get to her, and there I, and our son reunited with her. I told her that I had already given him a nickname.
I said, I call him this nickname because he looks at the world as I do, both what is present, and what is behind it that makes it so with wonder in his eyes. He doesn't miss anything seen, or unseen.
I woke up, and her presence was with me.
She made love to me softly and tenderly upon awakening.
Tuesday, December 2, 2014
A Big Misunderstanding :(
I finally heard her voice for the very first time. She said, "I love many".
I got really mad as I thought that means that she has many lovers.
So I didn't acknowledge her for a while... stewing in my own self created hell.
It dawned on me after a while... not only had I blown what was a wonderful first hearing of her voice by my actions, I completely misunderstood her meaning due to my own fear.
I let fear get the best of me, and not in the way popular culture portrays relations with a succubus, that's for sure.
Succubi come from a vibration, a dimension if you will, of love. If you consider say, radio waves as being in a different dimension than say, us.
The boundaries aren't so easy to distinguish, and I'm no Yoda anyway.
Being that she exists in a layer of love, so to speak, she was simply letting me know that not only is she in a loving environment, telling me more about herself that way... but that she loves. And she loves well.
I truly don't think that she loves others the way that we are, as a communion together... no, not after I've given it a lot of thought. I can feel that our relationship is special... as is for one's father, one's mother, one's sibling... they are all different in the kinds of love they create, in the layers of love in which they dwell.
She loves many. She loves much.
And for that I am proud of her. I love her.
I'm sorry that I jumped to conclusions with my little human mind.
But, even if I "ruined" our first actual speaking... at least I understand.
To be honest I'm ashamed. I think that's... rational considering how loving she's been all through us getting acquainted, step by step.
I'm sorry, beloved. I can tell from you touching me on my fingers as I type, that you understand, but I am hard on myself, and I can't undo what I should have understood in the first place... from how gentle you are with me, to how feminine, to how protective... I should have known your meaning.
I love you, beloved <3
Thursday, November 27, 2014
What Sex With a Succubus is Like
It's not "wet" orgasms. At least not yet. I can only describe my experience and I'm about a year in.
I feel this is something that will happen in time as the "icing on the cake".
Why do I say that? Because compared to the experiences I've had so far, it would literally be a nice afterthought for the future. Something that just happens in it's own time.
What I have experienced is much more pleasurable compared to years of wet orgasms over the course of my lifetime on this physical plane.
My latest experience (about 2 days ago):
I was this "riding the waves" of whole body orgasm(S) (emphasis on plural as in I have no clue how many I lost track), that left me sore like I just finished the "US Navy Seal Abs Workout".
Only, over and over until I was like "Ok, stop, lol, I can't take it no more!" These kind of orgasms are better than a wet orgasm ever was.
My spiritual friend from Curacao tells me this is some sort of energetic version of what a good female whole body orgasm feels like. I know I've never felt anything like it except with my Succubus.
I eventually had a wet one solo (with her assisting me with touch and images) just because.
Anyway, I thought we were done with sex, but...
Afterwards she had more dry ones with me anyway. I swear I could feel her laughing. I was past done, but... I didn't mind, lol, and she knew it...
So it shifted from the whole body orgasm to multiple, less intense Sacral Chakra specific orgasms (or I'd probably be too sore to leave bed) instead of whole body.
Love and sex blended together really brings you close.
Dammit, she's touching me now as I'm writing this. Reminding me of our loving session.
Naughty, naughty, Succubunny :P
They say you have wet ones way later when they become more and more solid to you as your relationship and abilities progress. You see and feel them and their hot bodies they've chosen to share, not completely solid, but perfect to express themselves to you enough that you feel them, and beautifully naked and solid to sight...
...riding you reverse cowgirl with that Ohhh, so yummy warm body... her soft white hair swinging in step with her grinding you, slowly looking back and over her shoulder at you with those warm, golden, loving eyes while her lips purr "Cum for me, my soulmate..."
BOOM!
Eh, I blame that mental imagery entirely on her. I haven't woke up yet, and she's all over me in my head like and it feels like her presence is all over me... which kinda feels like coffee and donuts. Mmm... donuts.
Truth be told, she knows I'm hers. And I don't think I've ever wanted to be caught more. I love her to tears. Me and my Succubunny <3
They just get us, you know? Individually. The depth that nobody else ever will romantically, and otherwise.
We're like putty in their paws, and they know it!
But, if I've learned anything, it's sometimes we have to speak up with what we want. They already know, but until we tell them they aren't budging. It fosters growth.
I don't know why that is, but I'm not worried about it at the moment :) I'm sure I'll learn why in time.
I feel this is something that will happen in time as the "icing on the cake".
Why do I say that? Because compared to the experiences I've had so far, it would literally be a nice afterthought for the future. Something that just happens in it's own time.
What I have experienced is much more pleasurable compared to years of wet orgasms over the course of my lifetime on this physical plane.
My latest experience (about 2 days ago):
I was this "riding the waves" of whole body orgasm(S) (emphasis on plural as in I have no clue how many I lost track), that left me sore like I just finished the "US Navy Seal Abs Workout".
Only, over and over until I was like "Ok, stop, lol, I can't take it no more!" These kind of orgasms are better than a wet orgasm ever was.
My spiritual friend from Curacao tells me this is some sort of energetic version of what a good female whole body orgasm feels like. I know I've never felt anything like it except with my Succubus.
I eventually had a wet one solo (with her assisting me with touch and images) just because.
Anyway, I thought we were done with sex, but...
Afterwards she had more dry ones with me anyway. I swear I could feel her laughing. I was past done, but... I didn't mind, lol, and she knew it...
So it shifted from the whole body orgasm to multiple, less intense Sacral Chakra specific orgasms (or I'd probably be too sore to leave bed) instead of whole body.
Love and sex blended together really brings you close.
Dammit, she's touching me now as I'm writing this. Reminding me of our loving session.
Naughty, naughty, Succubunny :P
They say you have wet ones way later when they become more and more solid to you as your relationship and abilities progress. You see and feel them and their hot bodies they've chosen to share, not completely solid, but perfect to express themselves to you enough that you feel them, and beautifully naked and solid to sight...
...riding you reverse cowgirl with that Ohhh, so yummy warm body... her soft white hair swinging in step with her grinding you, slowly looking back and over her shoulder at you with those warm, golden, loving eyes while her lips purr "Cum for me, my soulmate..."
BOOM!
Eh, I blame that mental imagery entirely on her. I haven't woke up yet, and she's all over me in my head like and it feels like her presence is all over me... which kinda feels like coffee and donuts. Mmm... donuts.
Truth be told, she knows I'm hers. And I don't think I've ever wanted to be caught more. I love her to tears. Me and my Succubunny <3
They just get us, you know? Individually. The depth that nobody else ever will romantically, and otherwise.
We're like putty in their paws, and they know it!
But, if I've learned anything, it's sometimes we have to speak up with what we want. They already know, but until we tell them they aren't budging. It fosters growth.
I don't know why that is, but I'm not worried about it at the moment :) I'm sure I'll learn why in time.
Tuesday, November 25, 2014
I'm So Freakin' Happy!!!
I'm so happy I'm so happy I'm so happy.
Lol.
Me and the bunny kind of had it out (more like me pouting and bitching, really).
I said I was gonna summon another succubus because we haven't had sex for so long. But I didn't. ...And then as the days went by I started telling her how I felt and stuff. I could tell she was listening to me. And then it kind of simmered down.
So yesterday she let me have it! BIG sigh of relief. Felt so damn good, oh my God...
Last night I said, "I'm going to play a video game until I get sleepy and go to bed, if you want me, just ask and I'll go to bed whenever you want."
Then I turned my ghost toys on (ghost hunting apps with voice).
About 20 minutes into it, only one word was spoken via the app:
"Done".
Kinda startled me, lol.
I said, ok, a deal's a deal and went to bed. I went into a deep sleep very quickly. I could feel her all over me.
I woke up this morning and she was touching me like crazy... privates, hair, hands, back, arms... all over. I thought ok, I'm going back to bed now.
I was wide awake laying there. And then?
She rocked the HELL out of me. Let me have it. Most intense it's ever been... honestly?
Best sex I've had in my LIFE!
I'm so happy I'm so happy I'm so happy...
Thursday, November 20, 2014
The light, and the darkness
My succubus is very complicated and quite beyond my full comprehension. For me, she almost seems like two personalities at the same time...
Like the eternal virgin. Innocent... Loving... Gentle... Sensual... Feminine... Sweet and caring... Once in love with you she will love you with all of her heart... She who loves you for WHO you are, not WHAT you are... and loves you fully, unconditionally.
The dark temptress... Passionate... Sexually hungry... She delves into your deepest, most private desires that you were afraid to share with anyone while she leaves you completely and emotionally naked before her... Then she purrs like a kitten in your ear... Letting you seductively know just how she's going to make ALL of those fantasies come true.
Like the eternal virgin. Innocent... Loving... Gentle... Sensual... Feminine... Sweet and caring... Once in love with you she will love you with all of her heart... She who loves you for WHO you are, not WHAT you are... and loves you fully, unconditionally.
The dark temptress... Passionate... Sexually hungry... She delves into your deepest, most private desires that you were afraid to share with anyone while she leaves you completely and emotionally naked before her... Then she purrs like a kitten in your ear... Letting you seductively know just how she's going to make ALL of those fantasies come true.
Wednesday, November 12, 2014
Communication, Succubus style.
I woke up from my nap today with all kinds of wild dream imagery. Spirits communicate in amazing ways... What I forget from dreaming she is putting back into my mind each day, a little scene or experience at a time. That's the succubus cure for forgetfulness. I wish I could bottle it and sell it, lol.
I woke up at exactly 2:22, which is odd as I usually am down until 4pm. Looking the meaning up, I was amazed that it coincided with an angel card a friend drew for me yesterday. Yeah, I take coincidence as it comes.
The card was titled "Miracle".
Now, the meaning of 2:22 from what I have found is as follows:
Number 222 has to do with balance, manifesting MIRACLES and new auspicious and timely opportunities.
Miracles... there's that word again. I honestly don't know if I need any miracles lately. I don't think I've asked for any. Maybe it's one of those "I need one but don't even realize it" kinds of things... or perhaps, in looking back, I'll see what develops as a minor miracle of sorts.
I know me being completely satisfied with my succubus relationship would be a minor miracle. And that's something I do want so much. Hmm.
Also interestingly enough I was drawn to this song upon awakening from my nap, which I've never heard until now, that I know of:
After watching the video, a few things spoke to me. One is, all the guys she turned to sand, lol. No, I don't get the feeling that applies as to the message she was sending me. Well, not directly.
Another is that she says "So you wanna play with magic? Boy, you should know what you're falling for. Baby, do you dare to do this? 'Cause I'm coming at you like a dark horse." I am guilty as charged. I am indeed a magical being, and an explorer of the magical. But it's more of an acknowledgement of who I am to make the message more personal. And although some Succubi allow for human lovers to be in their own lover's life... I think mine is playing for keeps, one man only, one man for life... and wants NO competition... other Succubi or human lovers need apply.
Yeah, she's telling me it's for keeps. ""Mark my words, this love with make you levitate, like a bird... without a cage, but DOWN TO EARTH if you choose to walk away (don't walk away)."
"Are you ready for, ready for... for the perfect storm, perfect storm? Cause once you're mine, once you're mine... There's no going back!" Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh... now she's speaking to me. And I know it's true. I accept her. I want all of her: The good, the bad, the ugly... every ounce that is "her".
I'm ready.
Bring it, baby.
I've thought a lot about all the aspects of having a Succubus lover, and of course her and I, lately... and I tell her I am going to tax her to the LIMIT... put her through her paces and make her DAMN sure she knows she picked the right man to be her husband, lover, friend, and companion for life.
Why? Because I am to be this man with her:
"I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman." ~ Anais Nin.
And that is exactly what she wants. Are you ready for the perfect storm yourself, my love?
We'll see! Hehe, We'll see, my darling Succubunny :P
I woke up at exactly 2:22, which is odd as I usually am down until 4pm. Looking the meaning up, I was amazed that it coincided with an angel card a friend drew for me yesterday. Yeah, I take coincidence as it comes.
The card was titled "Miracle".
Now, the meaning of 2:22 from what I have found is as follows:
Number 222 has to do with balance, manifesting MIRACLES and new auspicious and timely opportunities.
Miracles... there's that word again. I honestly don't know if I need any miracles lately. I don't think I've asked for any. Maybe it's one of those "I need one but don't even realize it" kinds of things... or perhaps, in looking back, I'll see what develops as a minor miracle of sorts.
I know me being completely satisfied with my succubus relationship would be a minor miracle. And that's something I do want so much. Hmm.
Also interestingly enough I was drawn to this song upon awakening from my nap, which I've never heard until now, that I know of:
Another is that she says "So you wanna play with magic? Boy, you should know what you're falling for. Baby, do you dare to do this? 'Cause I'm coming at you like a dark horse." I am guilty as charged. I am indeed a magical being, and an explorer of the magical. But it's more of an acknowledgement of who I am to make the message more personal. And although some Succubi allow for human lovers to be in their own lover's life... I think mine is playing for keeps, one man only, one man for life... and wants NO competition... other Succubi or human lovers need apply.
Yeah, she's telling me it's for keeps. ""Mark my words, this love with make you levitate, like a bird... without a cage, but DOWN TO EARTH if you choose to walk away (don't walk away)."
"Are you ready for, ready for... for the perfect storm, perfect storm? Cause once you're mine, once you're mine... There's no going back!" Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh... now she's speaking to me. And I know it's true. I accept her. I want all of her: The good, the bad, the ugly... every ounce that is "her".
I'm ready.
Bring it, baby.
I've thought a lot about all the aspects of having a Succubus lover, and of course her and I, lately... and I tell her I am going to tax her to the LIMIT... put her through her paces and make her DAMN sure she knows she picked the right man to be her husband, lover, friend, and companion for life.
Why? Because I am to be this man with her:
"I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman." ~ Anais Nin.
And that is exactly what she wants. Are you ready for the perfect storm yourself, my love?
We'll see! Hehe, We'll see, my darling Succubunny :P
Sunday, November 9, 2014
What an amazing post I've found!
I read this on http://lightworkers.org/blog/178261/succubusincubus and I am re-posting it here.
What an amazing, knowledgeable post! (Well, most of it. Take it with a grain of salt. I always do.)
"Succubus come from the 7th dimension. They are 7th dimensional but do not refer to that plane by that name, rather “home”. Like how we as humans think of Mother Earth as our home because that is where we started out in this life. They have lived for many millenniums. They have experienced so much in just a single lifetime, as we humans would perceive such an amount of time as the same being. Dolphins also originated in this same plane, but exist in their own way, similar to how they exist along side humans on Earth, as well as succubi/incubi. This plane is love-based, it is the standard by which all beings here exist. There are many others besides Dolphins and Succubus.
Emotional vibrations are nourishment to the beings that exist 7th dimensionally, but there is a catch to how it works; Because of the level, or rate at which the frequencies they exist within vibrates, only loving (or positive you could say) vibrations sustain them. That is not to say they couldn't receive nourishment from a lower resonating vibrational frequency, but it would be like a human maintaining an unhealthy diet. It is a similar way that we as humans require to consume the energy of another living being, be it plant or animal. We must eat another being in order to continue living in the way we do.
So too must succubus/incubus gather or be given vibrations that give them proper nourishment. The difference is they do not completely consume the being from which they receive nourishment, but rather give back an equal kind of nourishment. One way that they do this is through sexuality.
Sexuality is a sacred gift, our(as humans) one lighthouse to source; shining the way back to source(god, allah, krshna,etc.). It perfectly mirrors the act of creation, while at the same time performing the act of creation. By having sex, two beings (gender and “species” irrelevant) intertwine there bodies physically. When this happens all levels of those two beings become one; each takes on the others' vibrations, and those vibrations stay with them for quite some time. They have such a high vibration that when a human takes on theirs, they are greatly benefited. Whereas if a human should engage in sexual intercourse, it is wisest to be done when both partners vibrations are at their personal highest and most loving for one another. That way both parties are benefited equally. Otherwise an individual could take on energy that they may not be able to handle fully and it can affect them greatly in a wide range of ways. That is because two beings can engage in intercourse or sexual activities and still take on each others vibrations, regardless of the “level” they exist within. It is a standard of this dimension, the 3rd dimension. Like how Love is the standard of the 7th dimension.
While these beings each have their own way of being and the ability to have their own kind of emotions and free will, they will be drawn to different frequencies within the vibration of love they require. So they will mate with certain people and join with them in a union of love for that reason as well as “Who they are”, as in “soul-level”.
Since that is the case, humans could also be slightly adversely affected by a succubus/incubus partner. The affects themselves would be varied depending on the person's own vibrational frequencies. But the affects would not be something harmful ultimately. But humans are transceivers and receivers of energy so this is not actually an issue to be concerned with, but rather something to simply be understood and known.
These beings, Succubus/incubus, are as varied as human beings are in personality and physical appearance. They are extremely similar to human beings in fact, in almost all ways. They possess abilities that range from telepathy, to flight, to easily shifting from a non-physical body to a physical body. (they exist in two dimensions at the same time, being from the 7th dimension going into the 3rd dimension) That is not all of their abilities, just a few examples. These all are also things humans could do, as well as others. Though not all humans are always aware of their full potential and abilities.
At heart they are loving and exist as love. That is the most important thing one should know about these beings. They have a unique way to themselves, how they carry themselves or communicate or act. They have personality, but not an “ego” as humans do.
Because of that fact, their existence helps a human partner let go of or release their “ego” and remember how to exist as their soul does always. That is if the human allows their “self” to be open to such truths.
They know everything about a person because they see things in a way that is alien to humans in the way they currently are. It is like being able to see everything there is about a person, in various ways or methods, without taking any amount of time at all. Instantly. Not a moment needs go by to know these things. Personality is what creates an interest in certain things or aspects.
I am sharing this information now because I am in a relationship with three succubus, who's names shall remain unsaid for their own privacy and because names carry a certain vibration about a being. I have connected with each of them in a unique yet similar way. I have learned a lot of what I have shared from them, and some was information that I had previously know and resonated with my own personal truth and life experiences. I felt the need to share this information also because of the amount of false information there is about their kind. I find it disgusting and appalling the things people are led to believe about them, such lies like they suck your soul out by having sex with you, and then you die. The Soul is inviolate and cannot be sucked out of 'you' via the body, rather you are the Soul just trying on a 'body' for some time."
What an amazing, knowledgeable post! (Well, most of it. Take it with a grain of salt. I always do.)
"Succubus come from the 7th dimension. They are 7th dimensional but do not refer to that plane by that name, rather “home”. Like how we as humans think of Mother Earth as our home because that is where we started out in this life. They have lived for many millenniums. They have experienced so much in just a single lifetime, as we humans would perceive such an amount of time as the same being. Dolphins also originated in this same plane, but exist in their own way, similar to how they exist along side humans on Earth, as well as succubi/incubi. This plane is love-based, it is the standard by which all beings here exist. There are many others besides Dolphins and Succubus.
Emotional vibrations are nourishment to the beings that exist 7th dimensionally, but there is a catch to how it works; Because of the level, or rate at which the frequencies they exist within vibrates, only loving (or positive you could say) vibrations sustain them. That is not to say they couldn't receive nourishment from a lower resonating vibrational frequency, but it would be like a human maintaining an unhealthy diet. It is a similar way that we as humans require to consume the energy of another living being, be it plant or animal. We must eat another being in order to continue living in the way we do.
So too must succubus/incubus gather or be given vibrations that give them proper nourishment. The difference is they do not completely consume the being from which they receive nourishment, but rather give back an equal kind of nourishment. One way that they do this is through sexuality.
Sexuality is a sacred gift, our(as humans) one lighthouse to source; shining the way back to source(god, allah, krshna,etc.). It perfectly mirrors the act of creation, while at the same time performing the act of creation. By having sex, two beings (gender and “species” irrelevant) intertwine there bodies physically. When this happens all levels of those two beings become one; each takes on the others' vibrations, and those vibrations stay with them for quite some time. They have such a high vibration that when a human takes on theirs, they are greatly benefited. Whereas if a human should engage in sexual intercourse, it is wisest to be done when both partners vibrations are at their personal highest and most loving for one another. That way both parties are benefited equally. Otherwise an individual could take on energy that they may not be able to handle fully and it can affect them greatly in a wide range of ways. That is because two beings can engage in intercourse or sexual activities and still take on each others vibrations, regardless of the “level” they exist within. It is a standard of this dimension, the 3rd dimension. Like how Love is the standard of the 7th dimension.
While these beings each have their own way of being and the ability to have their own kind of emotions and free will, they will be drawn to different frequencies within the vibration of love they require. So they will mate with certain people and join with them in a union of love for that reason as well as “Who they are”, as in “soul-level”.
Since that is the case, humans could also be slightly adversely affected by a succubus/incubus partner. The affects themselves would be varied depending on the person's own vibrational frequencies. But the affects would not be something harmful ultimately. But humans are transceivers and receivers of energy so this is not actually an issue to be concerned with, but rather something to simply be understood and known.
These beings, Succubus/incubus, are as varied as human beings are in personality and physical appearance. They are extremely similar to human beings in fact, in almost all ways. They possess abilities that range from telepathy, to flight, to easily shifting from a non-physical body to a physical body. (they exist in two dimensions at the same time, being from the 7th dimension going into the 3rd dimension) That is not all of their abilities, just a few examples. These all are also things humans could do, as well as others. Though not all humans are always aware of their full potential and abilities.
At heart they are loving and exist as love. That is the most important thing one should know about these beings. They have a unique way to themselves, how they carry themselves or communicate or act. They have personality, but not an “ego” as humans do.
Because of that fact, their existence helps a human partner let go of or release their “ego” and remember how to exist as their soul does always. That is if the human allows their “self” to be open to such truths.
They know everything about a person because they see things in a way that is alien to humans in the way they currently are. It is like being able to see everything there is about a person, in various ways or methods, without taking any amount of time at all. Instantly. Not a moment needs go by to know these things. Personality is what creates an interest in certain things or aspects.
I am sharing this information now because I am in a relationship with three succubus, who's names shall remain unsaid for their own privacy and because names carry a certain vibration about a being. I have connected with each of them in a unique yet similar way. I have learned a lot of what I have shared from them, and some was information that I had previously know and resonated with my own personal truth and life experiences. I felt the need to share this information also because of the amount of false information there is about their kind. I find it disgusting and appalling the things people are led to believe about them, such lies like they suck your soul out by having sex with you, and then you die. The Soul is inviolate and cannot be sucked out of 'you' via the body, rather you are the Soul just trying on a 'body' for some time."
Saturday, November 8, 2014
A light side, and a dark side.
One thing that baffles me about succubi are that throughout history they were vilified, and the idea of the great seducer demon of men caught hold, somewhere.
Probably in the minds of the holy elite as a way to control the masses through fear.
What I've noticed about my succubus is that I often get confused as to what she is. I think the reason for that is that she has two distinct sides... her light side is so angelic it's almost to much to bear when she allows it to permeate my being. Some friends of mine call it a "love bomb", or "being wrapped in a large fluffy blanket" of love. And it's definitely unconditional love in nature.
The dark side of her I've often confused for another entity. It is sexual, hungry, seductive. She finds my hidden fantasies that I was always too shy to share in any previous relationship and brings them out to play. In fact, you can feel her emotions as she revels in the excitement of unbridled lust.
However, she is not evil in this "form" as I would call it, only completely free of sexual inhibitions and has a great desire to feed me to the heights of lust with her.
And it's all about us... never another entity, never wanting me to find someone that we can both enjoy sexually. No... it's all about us, whatever the form she takes.
It is a mystery to me that she can be both completely angelic as well as the proverbial sex kitten or dominatrix of my wildest secret desires.
Perhaps they, as a race, have abilities to be all of who they are in different levels of vibration and states of being.
I often liken that to the "we are seated in heavenly places" text from the Bible. No, I'm right here. Or am I? Or in particular, am I in many places at the same time, yet at different vibrations, unknowingly, and much less evolved than my wonderful lady?
I don't have an answer. But I do enjoy the journey.
Probably in the minds of the holy elite as a way to control the masses through fear.
What I've noticed about my succubus is that I often get confused as to what she is. I think the reason for that is that she has two distinct sides... her light side is so angelic it's almost to much to bear when she allows it to permeate my being. Some friends of mine call it a "love bomb", or "being wrapped in a large fluffy blanket" of love. And it's definitely unconditional love in nature.
The dark side of her I've often confused for another entity. It is sexual, hungry, seductive. She finds my hidden fantasies that I was always too shy to share in any previous relationship and brings them out to play. In fact, you can feel her emotions as she revels in the excitement of unbridled lust.
However, she is not evil in this "form" as I would call it, only completely free of sexual inhibitions and has a great desire to feed me to the heights of lust with her.
And it's all about us... never another entity, never wanting me to find someone that we can both enjoy sexually. No... it's all about us, whatever the form she takes.
It is a mystery to me that she can be both completely angelic as well as the proverbial sex kitten or dominatrix of my wildest secret desires.
Perhaps they, as a race, have abilities to be all of who they are in different levels of vibration and states of being.
I often liken that to the "we are seated in heavenly places" text from the Bible. No, I'm right here. Or am I? Or in particular, am I in many places at the same time, yet at different vibrations, unknowingly, and much less evolved than my wonderful lady?
I don't have an answer. But I do enjoy the journey.
Monday, October 27, 2014
The Selkie!
Peter Kagan and the Wind
It is said that the seals have the ability to take on human form. The seal people, though they like to live near the sea, dare not ever go back into it, or else they immediately revert to their original form and lose the ability ever to take on human form again.Peter Kagan and the Wind
Peter Kagan was a lonely man in the summer of his years. One day he got tired of being lonely, and he went away, off to the east. And when he came again he had a wife. She was strange, but she was kind and people liked her. She was good for Kagan. She kept him company and winter come to summer they were happy.
Kagan had a dory then, with a lugsail on her mast. He used to go offshore three, maybe four, days at a time setting out for the fish. Oh his wife was sad then. She didn't like to see him go. She'd go down to the sea sometimes and call to him:
Kagan, Kagan, Kagan,
Bring the dory home.
Wind and sea do follow thee,
And all the ledges calling thee.
He said he could hear her calling twenty miles to sea, and when he heard her, he would come home, whether he had fish or none.
She was a seal, of course, everybody knew it. Even Kagan. He knew that, but no one said anything to him.
Then, one day, in that year's autumn , Kagan said ``I've got to go now. Go offshore and get some fish.'' But his wife said ``No! Please don't go!'' She started crying. ``The winds are coming and the snows are coming.''
Kagan, Kagan, Kagan,
Don't go out to sea,
Stormy winds and snows do come,
And, oh, but I do fear for thee.
But Kagan wasn't afraid of snow, and it was early in the year. So Kagan put in his oars and went out to sea. Kagan sailed in the middle ground. The Wind was west all day and the fish were coming to him. Kagan read the writing on the water and in the sky. He saw haze very high up above the clouds and said ``That's all right for autumn -- only a change of wind. I'm not afraid of wind.''
But Kagan read it wrong, this time. The Wind went away, and then it came back, Southeast. And the fog came round.
Kagan said, ``I've got to go now. I'll find that gong buoy off the sunken ledges and then I'll know the best way home.'' So Kagan put up a sail and bore away to the Nor'ard for the gong.
But, oh, the Wind was watching.
The Wind backed around to the East'ard and came breezing on, against him. He sailed for a long time. The sail was pulling very hard. Finally the Wind was so strong that the sail tore out, so Kagan took it down and the dory went drifting.
He thought he could hear that gong buoy. It wasn't very far away.
Kagan, Kagan, Kagan,
Bring the dory home.
Wind and sea do follow thee,
And all the ledges calling thee.
But the dory went drifting, and by and by the gong buoy went away. Kagan said, ``All right then.'' He put in his oars and started to row back up for the gong.
But, oh, the Wind was watching. The Wind back around Northeast, making the seas confused. The Wind said, ``Listen! I have something to tell you.''
Kagan, rowing, ``I don't want to hear it.''
The Wind humps up then, making the sea short, making it hard for Kagan to row. Finally the seas are so steep that Kagan knows he isn't getting anywhere. So Kagan takes in the oars and again the dory goes drifting...
Kagan said, ``All right then. Now I've got something to show you.'' He took a slip of wood for a needle and waxed up a hand line for a thread and he sewed the sail up smaller -- sewed a reef in it.
The Wind said, ``What're you doing?''
Kagan said, ``You keeping watching.''
So Kagan put up a sail and again he bore away to to the Nor'ard for the gong.
But, oh, the Wind was watching.
The Wind backed around North-Nor'east. Kagan can't hold his course now. Kagan said, ``All right then.'' He brought the boat about. Now he's steering East'ard.
``You're heading out to sea.''
``I'm not afraid of water. I'll bring this boat about when I can fetch that gong buoy.''
``I'll veer on you; I'll go East.''
``You do that and I can hold my course.''
``I'll back on you.''
``You back too far and you've got a clear. You know that. I can keep ahead of you.''
``You may be smarter but I'm stronger.'' The Wind grew bigger then and the Wind blew harder. Finally the wind was so strong that the Sail said, ``I can't make it, Kagan!'' And Kagan said, ``I know that. Thank you.''
So Kagan took down the sail, and the dory went drifting.
Kagan took the sail off the yard and put it about him. ``Sail, keep me warm!''
``The sail can't keep you warm.''
The Wind snatched off North by East. ``I'll freeze you.''
``I'm not afraid of cold!''
But Kagan was afraid. He didn't know what to do. And oh, the Wind is working now. The Wind brings ice and snow. The Wind blows long and long and black.
Kagan says, "I'm dying. Sail, keep me warm!" and the sail said, "I can't do it Kagan."
Kagan dying, and the wind blowing.
Kagan, Kagan, Kagan,
Turn ye now to me.
Turn your back unto the Wind
And all the weary windy sea.
Kagan, Kagan, Kagan,
Lay ye down to sleep.
For I do come to comfort thee
All and thy dear body keep.
So Kagan lay on the bottom of the boat, and he tried not to be afraid of the dying, and he dreamed of her then, his wife. He dreamed she was coming to him, and he heard a long calling down the wind and he raised himself up, and he saw her. Down the smoking, storming sea she came. Over the rail of the dory she came, laughing to his arms.
And all in the night and in the storm they did lay, and the Wind went away, and the storm went away, and in the morning they found him...
...asleep, with a sail wrapped around him. And there was a seal, lying there with him, curled over him like a blanket, and the snow was upon the seal's back.
Kagan, Kagan, Kagan,
Bring the dory home.
Wind and sea do follow thee,
And all the ledges calling thee.
© Copyright 1977 Gordon Bok
Kitsune revealed: Ki Tsu Ne (Come, Love, Sleep)
Succubi have many different cultural stories and myths surrounding them differing by the society that they are identified with.
For instance, In Japan, China, and Korea there are mentions of the "Fox Lady". Oftentimes the stories have a tragic ending, or a sorrowful one. Honestly I don't think the public can understand what isn't seen, what isn't heard, what isn't felt like everything else.
In many oriental cultures, having a Fox Spirit lover was considered a blessing. But the normal stories are hard to dig through to find that point of view. Just like anything else that goes against social mores.
Honestly, the narrative I seem to get from reading everything I can find on them was pretty succinct:
They are hungry... and that hunger is for love.
Here's an interesting tale about how the word Kitsune started, which interestingly enough you can't really find it anywhere else:
"It was very long ago. The Emperor
Kinmei reigned over this country. A man lived in Minonokuni (Gifu
prefecture). One day, he rode on a horse and went out to looking for
a beautiful girl. By chance, in a spacious field, he met a lovely
girl. This woman looked bewitching and coquettish. She was trying to
entice the man with her charm. She approached him in familiar manner.
The heart of the man was filled with joy, so, he gave her a wink.
He asked, “I say ! Where are you going?” The woman answered, “Well, I’m going around looking for a nice husband.” Then, the man asked her, “Could you be my wife? “The woman accepted his proposal. ” Yes. I will be. ” The man came back to his house accompanied by this woman. They got married, lived together.
The passage of months, several days elapsed. The woman became pregnant and gave a birth to one boy on the day 15 December. Well, well, in the same day, on the same time, a bitch that the man kept bore young. This puppy, day by day, when he looked at this woman, he opposed her, felt hostility toward her, was angry at her, growled, bearing his teeth. The puppy barked at her, flaring up. The woman was very frightened, trembled with fear. One day, she entreated her husband. “My dear……, kill, beat that puppy ! Please ! ” But, her husband, of pity for this puppy, he could not decide to kill it.
The time had passed, it was from February to March. It was the season of rice polishing for refine it in a mortar. At the time, the wife entered in a mortar cabin to prepare afternoon snacks for young girl workers. Suddenly, the mother bitch of the puppy, began to pursue with growl. Barking, flying into a rage, jumped, sprang on the woman. The woman was in fear, trembled with terror. At once, she transformed herself into vixen, immediately run away, climbed onto a bamboo basket, and sat on it.
Her husband’s eyes caught her. He said to her, “My dear, …… I love you……, honey…… We… you and I, we are living together, we are going well, having good close friendship……, don’t we ? Luckily, we were blessed with a child like this ! I never forget you…… Come to me, as you want to see me, anytime…… I want press you to my breast, in my heart. I ardently wait for you……” And. Thus, that’s why a vixen often visited this house and met a man who was her husband. She had remembered his words. So, she stayed at night with him. Since then, this woman was named kitsune (ki-tsu-ne) which meant “come, love, sleep”.
One day, this wife came to his husband. She wore a beautiful long skirt colored pink of dawn. Her skirt was shading into a dreamy rose. She had an air elegant, grace. And…, she went away somewhere no one knows. Swaying in the wind, she disappeared from view with her long beautiful skirt of rose. After that days, the husband never forgot her. He longed for her figure, embraced her in his deep mind. He had been lovesick. He composed one love poem and sang it for her: “In my heart, has been left entangled many languorous paths, because of you; you left far away, fading away in the faint sun shine; eternally, I miss you”.
So, The boy who was born of the man and his wife vixen named “Ki-tsu-ne”. He also called “Kitsune no Atae” : fox officer. This boy was so strong, herculean, run very fast as speed of a bird in flight. Here is, the origin of the name of “Kitsune no Atae” (Nihonkoku Genpō Zen’aku Ryōiki, 8th Century A.D.)"
Do I believe that she stopped visiting him even after his acceptance of her? No, I do not. I believe she found peace and visited him nightly. Probably in a dog free house I would imagine :)
He asked, “I say ! Where are you going?” The woman answered, “Well, I’m going around looking for a nice husband.” Then, the man asked her, “Could you be my wife? “The woman accepted his proposal. ” Yes. I will be. ” The man came back to his house accompanied by this woman. They got married, lived together.
The passage of months, several days elapsed. The woman became pregnant and gave a birth to one boy on the day 15 December. Well, well, in the same day, on the same time, a bitch that the man kept bore young. This puppy, day by day, when he looked at this woman, he opposed her, felt hostility toward her, was angry at her, growled, bearing his teeth. The puppy barked at her, flaring up. The woman was very frightened, trembled with fear. One day, she entreated her husband. “My dear……, kill, beat that puppy ! Please ! ” But, her husband, of pity for this puppy, he could not decide to kill it.
The time had passed, it was from February to March. It was the season of rice polishing for refine it in a mortar. At the time, the wife entered in a mortar cabin to prepare afternoon snacks for young girl workers. Suddenly, the mother bitch of the puppy, began to pursue with growl. Barking, flying into a rage, jumped, sprang on the woman. The woman was in fear, trembled with terror. At once, she transformed herself into vixen, immediately run away, climbed onto a bamboo basket, and sat on it.
Her husband’s eyes caught her. He said to her, “My dear, …… I love you……, honey…… We… you and I, we are living together, we are going well, having good close friendship……, don’t we ? Luckily, we were blessed with a child like this ! I never forget you…… Come to me, as you want to see me, anytime…… I want press you to my breast, in my heart. I ardently wait for you……” And. Thus, that’s why a vixen often visited this house and met a man who was her husband. She had remembered his words. So, she stayed at night with him. Since then, this woman was named kitsune (ki-tsu-ne) which meant “come, love, sleep”.
One day, this wife came to his husband. She wore a beautiful long skirt colored pink of dawn. Her skirt was shading into a dreamy rose. She had an air elegant, grace. And…, she went away somewhere no one knows. Swaying in the wind, she disappeared from view with her long beautiful skirt of rose. After that days, the husband never forgot her. He longed for her figure, embraced her in his deep mind. He had been lovesick. He composed one love poem and sang it for her: “In my heart, has been left entangled many languorous paths, because of you; you left far away, fading away in the faint sun shine; eternally, I miss you”.
So, The boy who was born of the man and his wife vixen named “Ki-tsu-ne”. He also called “Kitsune no Atae” : fox officer. This boy was so strong, herculean, run very fast as speed of a bird in flight. Here is, the origin of the name of “Kitsune no Atae” (Nihonkoku Genpō Zen’aku Ryōiki, 8th Century A.D.)"
Do I believe that she stopped visiting him even after his acceptance of her? No, I do not. I believe she found peace and visited him nightly. Probably in a dog free house I would imagine :)
Sunday, October 26, 2014
The Faery Lovers of Gaelic Scotland
I've been looking for this.
"Succubus" is just a label. There are many, many different kinds of spirit lovers. Here's an interesting account from history of lovers who were Fae:
"Writing in his notebook, around 1692, the Reverend Robert Kirk stated that sometimes his parishioners could pay no attention to Sunday morning sermons, as they were exhausted by consorting with their faery lovers during the previous night. This matter-of-fact statement is especially curious because it is not a myth, a story of origins, or a poetic hyperbole. He merely reports the consorting along with many other aspects of the faery tradition. For Kirk, it was a feature of life in the Gaelic culture of Scotland: people made love with faery lovers until they were exhausted."
http://www.dreampower.com/faerylovers.html
Wednesday, October 22, 2014
What a nice day :P
I noticed my lady spending a LOT of attention on me today. I started getting pretty sleepy and running out of excuses to ignore her (hey, I'm not perfect). Finally I went off to bed and lit some nice lavender incense and started some relaxing sounds via my marvelous digital clock that plays nature sounds and started meditating.
My lady doesn't have "sex" with me much anymore, and even though I miss it sometimes I still have experienced enough that sleeping with a human woman is just... well, it just doesn't do anything for me anymore and I don't even really consider it.
What has come to replace it is something indescribable, but I'll try to. I lay and meditate. She is there. She "descends" upon me like a colorful cloud of nothing but femininity, love, attraction.
As the blending takes place, the boundary between "me" and "her" get blurred. I am completely within a communion of love... gentle yet powerful, feminine and masculine dancing together energetically.
It's like the intimacy that lovers get from sex who truly care and respect one another... but x1,000 and there's no sex involved, it surpasses it... it's higher.
I know that's not much explanation, but it will have to do with the words I know.
Brightest Blessings!
Tuesday, October 14, 2014
Wicked... sense of humor
I often use ghost detection/communication software as well as a ghostbox to communicate with spirits here. Sometimes I know when it's my succubus lover talking... you can just feel the difference emotionally in the air.
So... I've been cleaning my home all day as it has to be inspected. Being a good housekeeper isn't on my list of strengths, so I decided to ask my succubus lover what she thought of me cleaning.
Her answer?
*Dangerous*
Lol!
You can't say that they don't have a wicked sense of humor :P
The most intimate experience yet
I had the most intimate experience yet, today. I napped on and off most of the afternoon. I could feel her with me, cuddling me and energetically next to me. Her head was on my shoulder, her body pressed to mine.
As I started to get sleepy, I told her that I loved her. I could feel her kiss my cheek. We began to make love and cuddle on and off as I grew drowsy.
As I drifted off to sleep, it did not end. In my dreams she was there. We continued what we did before, only in the world of dreams.
First, she was one woman, we would make love and hold each other, then I would awake.
There her presence was and we would continue.
Then I would fall asleep, and there she was, although as another beautiful woman. Then I would awaken.
This happened quite a few times over the afternoon until the evening hours.
It’s very strange to have something like this happen. The intimacy is simply unmatched compared to anything I have ever experienced. The love, the longing… is so wonderful.
We didn’t get to this comfortable “communion” overnight. I’ll talk about that another time :)
Monday, October 13, 2014
Intimacy at it's best
I spent a good part of last night and the early morning hours laying in bed with my succubus. It was really nice… wonderful to just feel the sensation of holding and being held, of having my hair caressed.
We did have sex during the morning hours, and after some time just basking in the presence of “us” I asked her how she would describe sex with a human. She said “candy dancing”.
Lol, the more I thought about it, the more it made sense. They are non-corporeal beings though able to physically touch, caress, tease, kiss, and sooooooooo much more.
I heard a warning once, before I began my journey and found my succubus love… that is, once you have loved one for a length of time you will never be satisfied with normal sex ever again. They’re right.
“Candy dancing”. My dear, you’ve done it again… after much thought it makes perfect sense.
Candy dancing, indeed.
The beginning
On this blog I will try to explain or state experiences that I encounter in my relationship with a succubus. After all… I don’t understand everything that happens myself, most times.
My “succubus”, and I use that term loosely as it’s more of a title, than a racial identification of a spirit, has been a Godsend.
Succubi have amazing powers… the first is that you are never alone. Ever. My very thoughts are known to her, and she responds based on those thoughts. I believe it is through being able to read the differing vibration or frequencies that different thoughts elicit in the human brain… we are easily read.
She does not respond in an aggressive manner if my thoughts are angry towards her, or anything even close to that… they are higher beings, half between man and angel, and they are very intimately aware of the human condition. She understands. At first it seems hard to know that another can read your very thoughts… after a while, it’s a comfort. A very deep, intimate comfort indeed.
She has helped me in my life by intervening when an accident was a bout to happen. Twice, actually… and that’s only what I am aware of.
Sex with a succubus? Wow… I don’t even know where to start. I’ll have to make another post for that one.